I'm bored so tell me a joke?!
Question: I'm bored so tell me a joke!?
So i'm bored rite now!?any good jokes would be apprectiated thanx Www@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
A man checked into a hotel in Australia!. There was a computer in his
room,so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife!. However, he accidentally
typed the wrong e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent
the e-mail!.
Meanwhile!.!.!.!.!.somewhere in Houston , a widow had just returned home from
her husband's funeral!. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting
messages from relatives and friends!.
After reading the first message, she fainted!. The widow's son rushed
into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen
which read:
To : My Loving Wife
Subject : I've Arrived
Date: May 27 2006
I know you're surprised to hear from me!. They have computers here now,
and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones!. I've just arrived
and have been checked in!. I see that everything has been prepared for your
arrival tomorrow!. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is
as uneventful as mine was!.
P!.s It is damn hot down here !!Www@Enter-QA@Com
room,so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife!. However, he accidentally
typed the wrong e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent
the e-mail!.
Meanwhile!.!.!.!.!.somewhere in Houston , a widow had just returned home from
her husband's funeral!. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting
messages from relatives and friends!.
After reading the first message, she fainted!. The widow's son rushed
into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen
which read:
To : My Loving Wife
Subject : I've Arrived
Date: May 27 2006
I know you're surprised to hear from me!. They have computers here now,
and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones!. I've just arrived
and have been checked in!. I see that everything has been prepared for your
arrival tomorrow!. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is
as uneventful as mine was!.
P!.s It is damn hot down here !!Www@Enter-QA@Com
The Perfect Man and the Perfect Woman
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met!. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding!. Their life together was, of course, perfect!.
One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car (a Grand Caravan) along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress!. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help!.
There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys!. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle!. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys!.
Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident!. Only one of them survived the accident!.
Who was the survivor!? (Scroll down for the answer!.)
The perfect woman survived!. She's the only one who really existed in the first place!. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man!.
Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke!.
Men keep scrolling****!.
So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the perfect woman must have been driving!. This explains why there was a car accident!.
By the way, if you're a woman and you're reading this, this illustrates another point: women never listen!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met!. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding!. Their life together was, of course, perfect!.
One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car (a Grand Caravan) along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress!. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help!.
There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys!. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle!. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys!.
Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident!. Only one of them survived the accident!.
Who was the survivor!? (Scroll down for the answer!.)
The perfect woman survived!. She's the only one who really existed in the first place!. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man!.
Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke!.
Men keep scrolling****!.
So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the perfect woman must have been driving!. This explains why there was a car accident!.
By the way, if you're a woman and you're reading this, this illustrates another point: women never listen!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
yo mamma so fat that when she put on her yellow raincoat the kids yelled Catch that twinkie!.
Yo mamma so ugly that when she looked at a mirror it broke
yo mamma so fat when she jumped into the ocean the whales started singing we are family even though you're fatter than me!.
yo mamma so stupid that when she asked a fortune teller what would happen and so when she said you will live a long and terrible life, she ate the catfood that says will keep your cat alive longer
yo mamma so old that in first grade she was in class with adam and eve
yo mamma so fat that when she jumped on the bed it broke and she fell through three hundred floors and through the basement
yo mamma so stupid that when she took a dog for the walk she put the leash on herself instead of the dog
yo mamma so old that when you had a dance party at your house she was doing the jive
Www@Enter-QA@Com
Yo mamma so ugly that when she looked at a mirror it broke
yo mamma so fat when she jumped into the ocean the whales started singing we are family even though you're fatter than me!.
yo mamma so stupid that when she asked a fortune teller what would happen and so when she said you will live a long and terrible life, she ate the catfood that says will keep your cat alive longer
yo mamma so old that in first grade she was in class with adam and eve
yo mamma so fat that when she jumped on the bed it broke and she fell through three hundred floors and through the basement
yo mamma so stupid that when she took a dog for the walk she put the leash on herself instead of the dog
yo mamma so old that when you had a dance party at your house she was doing the jive
Www@Enter-QA@Com
this isn`t exactly a joke it`s a poem but it made me laugh!
it`s by Shel Silverstein
I don`t remember how it goes but I`ll make it into a joke/story like thing!.
The Gardner hired you to water his plants but when he came to check on you he said
"I hired you to water the plants, now zip up your pants!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
it`s by Shel Silverstein
I don`t remember how it goes but I`ll make it into a joke/story like thing!.
The Gardner hired you to water his plants but when he came to check on you he said
"I hired you to water the plants, now zip up your pants!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
ummm!.!.ok!?well,*koff* here's an old blond joke - a blond,brunette,and a red-head were stranded on an island!.one day the girls found a magic lamp!.when they rubbed it a gene came out and said "since you three have freed me i will give you each one wish" the brunette thought for a minute and said"i wish i was back with my family",then after a snap of the genes fingers,she was home!then the red-head said "i wish i was with my boyfriend"!.and again the gene snapped and she was in her boyfriends arms!.but then the blond started to cry!.the gene says,"whats the mater!?" then the blond goes "im all alone!oh,i wish my friends were still here!" and after a snap of the genes fingers they were back in the island!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Blonde goes to a soda pop machine!.!.!. she puts in her money!. She gets a coke!. She puts it on the ground!. Then she puts in her money!. She gets a Mountain Dew!. She puts it on the ground!. Then she gets another coke!. Puts it on the ground!. Then she gets another Mountain Dew and puts it on the ground!.
A man comes up to her and asks, "What are you doing!?"
And she says, "I'm winning!"
Www@Enter-QA@Com
A man comes up to her and asks, "What are you doing!?"
And she says, "I'm winning!"
Www@Enter-QA@Com
A blonde was driving wrecklessly when she was pulled over by the police!.
You do know you are driving wrecklessly!? He asked
Yes!. She answered!.
Then why are you driving like that!?
I am trying to get away from that tree, but I can't!.
That's you airfreshener, Lady!
Have A Nice Day!.!.!.ツWww@Enter-QA@Com
You do know you are driving wrecklessly!? He asked
Yes!. She answered!.
Then why are you driving like that!?
I am trying to get away from that tree, but I can't!.
That's you airfreshener, Lady!
Have A Nice Day!.!.!.ツWww@Enter-QA@Com
JACK AND JILL REMAKE
jack and jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuanna
jack got high
pulled down his fly
and asked jill if she wanna
jill said yes
pulled up her dress
and had a lil fun
but stupid jill
forgot the pill
and now they have a sonWww@Enter-QA@Com
jack and jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuanna
jack got high
pulled down his fly
and asked jill if she wanna
jill said yes
pulled up her dress
and had a lil fun
but stupid jill
forgot the pill
and now they have a sonWww@Enter-QA@Com
Three people walked into a bar, but the fourth one ducked!. Some cannibals were eating a comedian when one asks: "Does this taste funny!?" Www@Enter-QA@Com
Have you heard about the new mint flavored birth control pills that women take right before sex!?!?!?!?!?
They are called Predickamints!. Www@Enter-QA@Com
They are called Predickamints!. Www@Enter-QA@Com
What does a alligator drink!? GATORADE!.LOL Why did the chicken croos the road!? to get to the other side!? roflWww@Enter-QA@Com