Ten points for the funniest jokes.?!


Question: I wahant funny jokes.it can be any joke like racial joke,blond jokes it doesnt matter but it has to be funny.and the funniest joke wins ten points


Answers: I wahant funny jokes.it can be any joke like racial joke,blond jokes it doesnt matter but it has to be funny.and the funniest joke wins ten points

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza?
when you put a pizza in the oven it doesn't scream!

Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

Because he was feeling crummy!

a guy walked into a bar and said "ow". haha

why 6 afraid of 7........
because 7 8 9

"A guy phones the local hospital and yells, `you've gotta send help! My wife's in labour!"

The nurse says, `calm down. Is this her first child?' He replies, `no! This is her husband!"'

WARNING:These are pretty mean

Why did Helen Kellers dog kill himself?

You would too if your name was dfjhgdjgdhkj

How do Helen Kellers parents punish her?

They leave the plunger sticking out of the toilet

what do you call 100 mescans on the roof?


CHINGOSSS!! haha


PS: im hispanic but you have to know spanish to get the joke Chigles/Chigos

Why did the pervert cross the road?

Because his d*&#* was stuck in the chicken.

#2 How can you tell a blonde is having a bad day?

She has a tampon above her ear and she can't find her pencil.

Q: How do you say good-bye to a skeleton on its way out of town?
A: "Bone" voyage

well these two brothers are having a battle back to back and have guns and stab each other with and a deaf police officer comes to hear and runs walking to them and finds the two boys dead and stabs them with the gun!

Get it!!!!
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

This is a yo momma joke......

Yo momma so old her nipples look like saladitos.

If u dont know wat saladitos r look it up or go 2 a store

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."second joke...........A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his beautiful, blond, female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.

She opened it, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into her house.

A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came again. She marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"

To which she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps telling me I've got mail!"

Two old people, a man and a woman, walk into a hospital. The doctor says to the old man, "I'll need a urine sample, a feces sample, and a blood sample." The old man says, "What?" So the doctor says it again. Once again the old man says, "what?" So the doctor yells it, "I NEED A URINE SAMPLE, A FECES SAMPLE, AND A BLOOD SAMPLE!" With that the old woman turns to the old man and says, "He needs a pair of your underwear!"

A guy goes to the doctor..the doc says Joe, you have to stop masturbating...Joe says, Why doc? Doc replies..because I'm trying to examine you!



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