What do you think...honest opinions please?!


Question: What do you think!.!.!.honest opinions please!?
you made me laugh
you made me smile
at first i thought it was worth a while
you liked me
but i loved you
you broke my my heart
into little parts
you got me thinkin
if you still care
if you ever wanta get back together
just say when and where
my heart
i'm still peicing together
desperate for you forever

please tell me why you do/don't like it
and tell me what to change

10 pts for most helpful!Www@Enter-QA@Com


Answers:
i like it,
its very sweet!.

bout your ex rite!?
ive dαted my ex 5 timess!.!.
id love to go for α 6th :$

love stinks sometimes
doesnt it !?Www@Enter-QA@Com

I like ti but ive capitalized the parts i would change:

you made me laugh
you made me smile
at first i thought it was worth while
you liked me
YET I LOVED YOU
you broke my heart
INTO OH SO LITTLE PARTS
you got me thinking
THAT IF YOU STILL CARE
YOU MIGHT WANNA GO BACK THERE
TOGETHER
just say when and where
MY HEART I'M STILL PEICING TOGETHER
YET IM desperate for you forever

if this is for a person then i hope this makes them realise what they're missing out on becuz a person this dedicated has got 2 b worth gettin 2 know!
good luck
artsygalWww@Enter-QA@Com

It's great, but here's a few things I'd correct:

-spelling (wanta=want to; peicing=piecing; thinkin=thinking)

-capitals and commas

-Instead of "At first I thought it was worth a while", I'd change it to "At first I thought it was worthwhile"

- I'd put "my heart, I'm still piecing together" on the same line!.

Hope this helps! Www@Enter-QA@Com

It's good but i would suggest keeping the structure the same throughout your poem!. i!.e!. 1st line would be the leading line, 2nd line would be the 1st rhyming line and the 3rd line would rhyme with the 2nd line!.
Keeping to the same pattern will make it flow better when spoken!.

good luck =)Www@Enter-QA@Com

well it's not bad!.!.but not to print in a book!.!.!.!.i see a rap song comin round this!. keep workin' girl, cause you got style!.!.!.!.!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

that's good!. you should write a whole song and make that the chourus!. I love it!. It's really goodWww@Enter-QA@Com

Since you're trying rhyming, it might work better if you had the same number of syllables in each line or perhaps every other line!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

Great song!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.you shouldn't be typing it here les someone will steal your songs!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

dont change it i looooved it!!!!
because it came from ur heart and soul!.
if that was the way u want it, keep it, dont change it 4 anyone;)Www@Enter-QA@Com

Put to appropriate music it might make a good pop single - of a rather old fashioned kind though!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

that was really really goodWww@Enter-QA@Com

That's really good, it shows a lot of emotions without outright saying what the are!. I like it! ^_^Www@Enter-QA@Com

If he hurt you drop him and move on!. There is better out there!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

It was ok but that could sound betterWww@Enter-QA@Com

wow that was amazing
i love it!
You don't need to change anything!Www@Enter-QA@Com

Gay FagWww@Enter-QA@Com

i think it's good, i really like it:)Www@Enter-QA@Com

honestly it's rubbishWww@Enter-QA@Com

Heartfelt, but bad!. If this is meant to be a poem, it's not good at all!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

WOW THAT WAS GREAT!!!!!!!!wow!.!.ans im a poet=]and that was!.!.!.that right tere was really good!.!.!.!.but how about

The best thing about tonights that we're not fighting
could it be that we have been this way before!?
i know u dont think that i am trying
i know that ur wearing things down to the core
but hold ur breath
becuz tongiht will be the night that i will fall for you
over agsin
dont make me change my mind
i wont live to see another day
i swear its true
becuz a guy like yous impossible to find
ur impossible to find!.!.!.!.!.!.
this is not what i intended
i always swore to u id never fall apart
you always thought that i was drunker
i may have failed but i loved you from the start
but hold ur breath
becuz tonight will be the night that i will fall for u
over again
dont make me change my mind
i wont live to see another day
i swear its true
becuz a guy like u's impossible to find


thats just a vi versa of "Fall for you" by Secondhand Serenade!.!.!.!.!.!.ITS AND AMAZING SONG!.!.!.trust me!.!.listen to it!.!.!.it'll give u ideas for great poetry!.!.!.sure did for me!.!.!.and now i have over ten poems and 4 songs just becuz of the sweet confidence i got form that song!.!.!.trust me:]listen to it!.!.!.!.!.!.hope i helped!!:]
Www@Enter-QA@Com



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