Easy points to anyone who can tell a good joke and make me smile?!
Question: my car was broken into and my cd player and all my cds were stolen.. i need someone to cheer me up.. any takers??
Answers: my car was broken into and my cd player and all my cds were stolen.. i need someone to cheer me up.. any takers??
Talking penguins are our friends.
you have to say your answer out loud k?
i say...knock knock
....you say....whos there
i say....i eat mop
you say.... i eat mop who....
A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question.
As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman
beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They
are both quite startled.
The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as
your breast, I know you'll forgive me."
She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 436."
I've heard this thing TONS of times and it still makes me laugh every time!
http://www.betterloverseminar.com/desi_w...
Trust me... its not nudie pics or anything... its a radio show
i dunno if you heard this one before but here it goes. it may seem long, but i laughed really hard when i read it.
A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his check-up, the doctor called the wife into his office alone.
He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe disease, combined with horrible stress. If you don't do the following, your husband will surely die: "Each morning fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant and make sure he's in a good mood. For lunch make him a nutritious meal he can take to work. And for dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him. Do not burden him with chores, as this could further his stress. Don't discuss your problems with him it will only make him stress worse. Try to relax your husband in the evening by wearing lingerie and giving him plenty of back rubs. Encourage him to watch some type of sporting event on T.V. And most importantly make love with your husband several times a week and satisfy his every whim. "If you can do this for 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely."
On the way home the husband asked his wife , "What did the doctor say?"
"You're going to die." she replied.
Oh that sucks
I enjoy these very much, still
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_oACRt-Qp...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjRe13zD1...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pY5zDQWd5...
Wanna know why Santa has no kids?.............He only cumz in a chimmney...
Why do ducks have webbed feet? To stamp out forest fires.
Why do elephants have black feet? Stamp out burning ducks.
Hope your day gets better.
Cheers from Australia