Please rate my song lyrics!?!
Question: Please rate my song lyrics!!?
Im 13!. and this is one of the many songs ive written!. definetly not my best but i would like feedback anyway!.
So here it is:
Lost in a ocean of lies
stinking beneath the surface
so that im
drowning, drowning, drowning
sinking down
too the ocean ground!.
Chorus:
Why did i ever start this lie
Why did I ever let it progress
Why, Why, Why!.
am I drowning, in this sea of lies
The surface out of sight
I try to swim up
But ocean pulls me down
I try to make things right
But its too late now
Chorus
Down under
I struggle
to breathe
I cannot see
My luungs bursting
My heart aching
Why!. Cant I!. Break Free!
Chorus
(in this seeaa of lies)
Thanx for reading it!. Please rate or give me any feedback!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
So here it is:
Lost in a ocean of lies
stinking beneath the surface
so that im
drowning, drowning, drowning
sinking down
too the ocean ground!.
Chorus:
Why did i ever start this lie
Why did I ever let it progress
Why, Why, Why!.
am I drowning, in this sea of lies
The surface out of sight
I try to swim up
But ocean pulls me down
I try to make things right
But its too late now
Chorus
Down under
I struggle
to breathe
I cannot see
My luungs bursting
My heart aching
Why!. Cant I!. Break Free!
Chorus
(in this seeaa of lies)
Thanx for reading it!. Please rate or give me any feedback!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
it has potential , but I would take out some of the extra words that aren't needed so that you can still get the image across, but with out being too obvious about it--- and maybe avoid using the word "I", even if it is about you--you could write it in the third person, so using "she" instead, that way it might make it easier to connect with!.
as it is now I would give it a 75 out of 100Www@Enter-QA@Com
as it is now I would give it a 75 out of 100Www@Enter-QA@Com
umm a 7 or 8 out of 10!. It's not bad, but it's hard to tell without the actual music!.!.!.!. so yeah!. Good job though!.
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8/10!?
For a 13 year old that's quite impressive!. Deep!.
I think it would be better if you had less reference to water and the sea all the time because otherwise it's a bit repetitive!. But it's good! :)Www@Enter-QA@Com
For a 13 year old that's quite impressive!. Deep!.
I think it would be better if you had less reference to water and the sea all the time because otherwise it's a bit repetitive!. But it's good! :)Www@Enter-QA@Com
Pretty deep, but I don't get a lot of the rhyme, and without knowing the tune, it's hard to tell how exact the rhymes need to be!.
but yeh pretty good!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
but yeh pretty good!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
not bad, especially if its going to be a fast paced song or have a strong beatWww@Enter-QA@Com
deceeeeeeeeent
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You really got the emo lyrics down!. i would say 7 or 8 out of 10Www@Enter-QA@Com
lyrics are good, but the music will decide if it sinks or swims (no pun intended) Www@Enter-QA@Com
89/10Www@Enter-QA@Com
wow thats really good! 1000/10 =DWww@Enter-QA@Com
thats really good!. If you cna sing then you should try to get noticedWww@Enter-QA@Com
thats really good!
are you in a band or something!?
it looks good and will probably sound great two
well done xWww@Enter-QA@Com
are you in a band or something!?
it looks good and will probably sound great two
well done xWww@Enter-QA@Com
on a scale of 1-10 i give it a 15 1/2!.Www@Enter-QA@Com