Some songs i wrote what do you think?!
Question: Some songs i wrote what do you think!?
the 1st one is about pku and how she doesnt know anyone else who has it!. and that
she doesnt relate to anyone not even her family!.not fully done!.
title:when you feel so alone
they got the news today
on the first day of her life
had to keep on living life
like she just dont belong
when you feel so alone
like no one understands
who she really is
when you feel so alone
when you feel like you cant relate
and you wanna know the truth
is there gonna be a cure
but they just dont know for sure
when you feel so alone
the 2nd so is called Father to the 7th power(exponent)its kind of like 7 things by miley cryus but i changed the lyrics to fit better
your a drunk
your a bum
you immature
you love us but you love it more
you never made me laugh only mad me cry
but know its time to say bye-bye
but the 7th thing i hate the most is that you only called when you wanted to
when you needed something
not when we needed you
but when you felt like playing a fatherWww@Enter-QA@Com
she doesnt relate to anyone not even her family!.not fully done!.
title:when you feel so alone
they got the news today
on the first day of her life
had to keep on living life
like she just dont belong
when you feel so alone
like no one understands
who she really is
when you feel so alone
when you feel like you cant relate
and you wanna know the truth
is there gonna be a cure
but they just dont know for sure
when you feel so alone
the 2nd so is called Father to the 7th power(exponent)its kind of like 7 things by miley cryus but i changed the lyrics to fit better
your a drunk
your a bum
you immature
you love us but you love it more
you never made me laugh only mad me cry
but know its time to say bye-bye
but the 7th thing i hate the most is that you only called when you wanted to
when you needed something
not when we needed you
but when you felt like playing a fatherWww@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
I don't know what you're going for!. !. !.and take my answer with a grain of salt, I'm biased towards some of the greatest poets, so i'll come off pretty harsh!.
First off, correct usage of "you're" and working on your grammar would be nice, if you were going for a specific effect it would be different, but I know it's not intentional!.
Second, the lyrical content isn't exotic!. !. !. by any means!. To be blunt, they're generic!. I can imagine this as a 1-4-5 sung by some disney slut!. Take that as you will!.
Good luck!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
First off, correct usage of "you're" and working on your grammar would be nice, if you were going for a specific effect it would be different, but I know it's not intentional!.
Second, the lyrical content isn't exotic!. !. !. by any means!. To be blunt, they're generic!. I can imagine this as a 1-4-5 sung by some disney slut!. Take that as you will!.
Good luck!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
The first one is ok, you should try experimenting with more complex rhymes and try not to repeat the same thing so much!.!.!.but you did pretty good! I like the second one too besides the fact that you used another artist song as "inspiration"!.
PS: It was pretty good!Www@Enter-QA@Com
PS: It was pretty good!Www@Enter-QA@Com
nice job! but the only reason I'm here is to tell crakkahh above me that I'm her worst enemy and I call her miscellaneous dumb things and give her fake insulting links on her questions!. LOLWww@Enter-QA@Com
your a drunk
your a bum
you immature
i heard this before i think!.!.
i think its called - your a ***** or something, its a powerballadWww@Enter-QA@Com
your a bum
you immature
i heard this before i think!.!.
i think its called - your a ***** or something, its a powerballadWww@Enter-QA@Com
the first one is amazing!. the second one makes me sad because it is just like my father!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Its realy good, but its hard to think what it sounds like without the tune!. : )Www@Enter-QA@Com
or a mother ******!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
i like the first one way betterWww@Enter-QA@Com
I really like the first oneWww@Enter-QA@Com