R&P: What do you think of my poem?!


Question: R&P: What do you think of my poem!?
Nobody gets past the outside
It’s like they’re locked behind a gate
They have no key
No way to get in
But they aren’t willing to be open
They hate to be honest
Especially with themselves
All they see is what they want to
Not the truth
The truth gives you the key
The key to the world
It will help you understand
Too bad you don’t
You need everything perfect
You don’t see any flaws in yourselves
I see flaws in all of you
All of you trapped on the outside
On the inside, it’s a different world
Nobody is fake
We all see each other for who we are
Not how you look
Such a material world
Out there on the outsideWww@Enter-QA@Com


Answers:
It has such a great meaning behind it and i thought it was very enjoyable because your talking about the people in this world even though there is a lot of hatred going on!.

In conclusion it is a great poemWww@Enter-QA@Com

"No one gets past the outside"!.!.!.!?

Switching from a third person to a second person form halfway through the poem doesn't flow very well!. Keep it consistent!. Either "they" are on the outside or whatever or "you" are on the outside!. I don't get what the "truth" is, or the key thing!.

If there was some more evocative imagery or !.!.!. I dunno, I'd like to be able to bring something away from it, but as it is I got nothing!.

Keep writing, it's definitely a start!.!.!.

SaulWww@Enter-QA@Com

If you were aiming for "dark & cynical" then I don't think that's what you actually got!.

I found it quite different, I don't know if you did yourself but I couldn't get what it actually meant!.

You could make song lyrics out of this poem!.

Very nice!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

I really like it!. I think I like it becuase it is the thing I have being trying to say for the longest but I haven't found the words!. And here you come with the perfect words on a sliver tray!. And what they say is "dark and cynical" I would like to call the truth!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

wow!.

i think thats an awesome poem!.

everything about it is amazing!.

i think it would make an EXCELLENT song!.

find someone and send it in!.

wow!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

the truth gives you the key
the key to the world


thats pretty sweet bro =)Www@Enter-QA@Com

awesome poemWww@Enter-QA@Com

It dont seem poem like to me, more lyrical, but regardless, very good!Www@Enter-QA@Com

ahh i like it!. that is a very good poem! and i agree it is very lyrical

peaceWww@Enter-QA@Com

cool, very, very cool!. good work!. not to mention you complimented my riff if you remember so its payback time anyway!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

I like it, its sorta dark & cynicalWww@Enter-QA@Com

you must be quite young!. i will spare
you my opinion!.Www@Enter-QA@Com



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