Star Wars fans...I have a marriage question related to Yoda?!
Question: Yoda says..."Do or Do not, there is no try" to Luke during his training. Is it unreasonable to feel that way in a marriage after an affair? It is unreasonable to want to know if someone believes it can be fixed and is willing to go the distance regardless. To me, saying we'll "try" leaves the opening for us to give up. I feel like I need certainty... is this feeling just the last of my belief in fairytales? How do you feel about the word "try" versus "We are going to do all it takes to work this out." (Assuming you really still care about the person and want to be with them.)
Answers: Yoda says..."Do or Do not, there is no try" to Luke during his training. Is it unreasonable to feel that way in a marriage after an affair? It is unreasonable to want to know if someone believes it can be fixed and is willing to go the distance regardless. To me, saying we'll "try" leaves the opening for us to give up. I feel like I need certainty... is this feeling just the last of my belief in fairytales? How do you feel about the word "try" versus "We are going to do all it takes to work this out." (Assuming you really still care about the person and want to be with them.)
Well your interpretation of "try" may be different than what someone else can mean by it. I understand your thoughts though. Doing sounds more committed and determined. If you have doubts that to this person "try" does not really mean the same as "do" to them then yes, you have right to question the level of effort on their behalf. Talk to them and explain your feelings on these two words, to reach a common ground and a happy, honest understanding of each other and what you are getting committed to.
Woa, thats pretty deep.
Are you sure there isnt a question about Wookies I could answer for you?
I guess the concept of "try" is a little different in a marriage.
You are going to TRY and make your marriage work, because it involves people's feelings, a situation where one has thrown trust between the 2 marriage partners out and where another has to TRY and and forgive or move on...
In a marriage situation the word "try" means the same as "we are going to do all it takes to work this out".
I cant actually believe you're equating a movie line with a marriage situation.
You are getting your life's advise from a cartoonish character in a movie. Unfortunately life isn't black & white.
In your last sentence you ask "How do you feel about the word 'try' versus 'we are going to do all it takes to work this out'." Aren't those the same thing. Do or do not? It's not that easy. Give it your all and try as hard as you can if you love this person. But it is impossible to say "I am doing it" with certainty when you are relying on another.
Assuming you really still care about the person and want to be with them, then try to work things out. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work...unfortunately that's life. But follow your heart...not Yoda's teachings.
Remember, if George Lucas was brilliant enough to give Yoda all of the right answers to life, he wouldn't have made that garbage he calls Episode 6, 1, 2 & 3.