Random Q, whats the funniest Joke you have ever heard?!


Question: Random Q, whats the funniest Joke you have ever heard!?
easy points, the joke i find the funniest, by me and my friend, will get points
=D!

will be selected in the next 1-2 days!. =]!.


have fun!.
=]

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Answers:
Little Bobby came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner!.

His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted!.

Mom, I want a bike for my birthday!.

Little Bobby was a bit of a troublemaker!.

He had gotten into trouble at school and at home!.

Bobby's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday!.

Little Bobby, of course, thought he did!.

Bobby's mother wanted Bobby to reflect on his behavior over the last year!.

Go to your room, Bobby, and think about how you have behaved this year!.

Then write a letter to God and tell him why you deserve a bike for your birthday!.

Little Bobby stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter!.

************ **
Letter 1

Dear God,

I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday!.

I want a red one!.

Your friend,

Bobby

************ **

Bobby knew that this wasn't true!. He had not been a very good boy this year,

So he tore up the letter and started over!.

************ **

Letter 2


Dear God,


This is your friend Bobby!. I have been a good boy this year and I would like

A red bike for my birthday!. Thank you!.


Your friend,
Bobby

************ **
Bobby knew that this wasn't true either!. So, he tore up the letter and started again!.

************ **

Letter 3

Dear God,

I have been an OK boy this year!. I still would really like a bike for my birthday!.

Bobby

************ **

Bobby knew he could not send this letter to God either!. So, Bobby wrote a fourth letter!.

************ **

Letter 4

God,

I know I haven't been a good boy this year!. I am very sorry!.

I will be a good boy if you just send me a bike for my birthday!.

Please! Thank you,

Bobby

************ **

Bobby knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get him a bike!.


Now, Bobby was very upset!. He went downstairs and told his mom that he wanted to go to church!.

Bobby's mother thought her plan had worked, as Bobby looked very sad!.

Just be home in time for dinner, Bobby's mother told him!.


Bobby walked down the street to the church on the corner!.

Little Bobby went into the church and up to the altar!.

He looked around to see if anyone was there!.


Bobby bent down and picked up a statue of the Mary!.

He slipped the statue under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street, into the house, and up to his room!.

He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen!.

Bobby began to write his letter to God!.

************ **

Letter 5

God,


I'VE KIDNAPPED YOUR MAMA!. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE!!!!!!


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Poor Guy

This guys walks into a bar and the bartender immediately notices how depressed this guy is!. "Give me a beer", said the guy!. "Sure thing," said the bartender, "by the way, why the long face!? "I just found out my oldest son is gay", replied the guy!.

The next day the same guy walks back into the bar and orders a beer and a few shots of whiskey!. "Whats wrong now!?", asked the bartender noticing he is twice as depressed as the day before!. "I just found out my youngest son is gay too!."

The next day the same guy walks in with tears pouring out of his eyes!. "God doesn't anyone in your house like girls!?", asked the bartender!.

The guy said, "Yeah, my wife!"Www@Enter-QA@Com

Fred was a poor student who desperately needed to supplement his income, so he got a job doing surveys on members of the public!. His first survey was about female sanitary protection!. He approached his first 'victim' and said 'excuse me madam, what pads do you use!?' She said 'I use tampax'!. 'Thank you madam' he says and writes it down!. He says to the next woman 'excuse me madam, what pads do you use!?' She says 'I use Always'!. 'Thank you madam' he says and writes it down!. He approaches the third woman:'Excuse me madam, what pads do you use!?' She says 'I use Brillo Pads!'!. 'Thank you' says Fred 'You're a bright c**t aren't you!?'Www@Enter-QA@Com

When You're Over 50!.!.!.
Kidnappers are not very interested in you!.

In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first!.

No one expects you to run into a burning building!.

People call at 9 p!.m!. and ask, "Did I wake you!?"

People no longer view you as a hypochondriac!.

There's nothing left to learn the hard way!.

Things you buy now won't wear out!.

You can eat dinner at 4 p!.m!.

You can live without sex (but not without glasses)!.

You enjoy hearing about other people's operations!.

You get into a heated argument about pension plans!.

You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it!.

You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge!.

You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room!.

You sing along with the elevator music!.

Your eyes won't get much worse!.

Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off!.

Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the National Weather Service!.

Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either!.

Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size!.

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These are actual excuse notes teachers have received, spelling mistakes included!.
Please excuse Lisa for being absent!. She was sick and I had her shot!.

Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday!. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday!.

Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan!. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33

----------------------------------------!.!.!.

A truck driver amused himself by running over lawyers as they walked down the side of the road!. Every time he saw a lawyer walking along the road, he would swerve to hit him!. There would be a loud "thud", and then he would swerve back on the road!.

As the truck driver drove along one day, he saw a priest hitch hiking, he pulled over and asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father!?"

The priest said he was on his way to his church up the road!.

"I'll give you a lift!."

The priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road!. Suddenly, the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively swerved to hit him!. At the last minute, he remembered he had a priest in the truck and swerved back onto the road!. Even though he knew he missed the lawyer, he still heard a loud "thud!." Unsure of where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors!. When he didn't see anything, he turned to the priest and said, "I'm sorry, Father!. I almost hit a lawyer!."
The priest replied, "That's OK, I got him with the door!.






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There was this naughty boy Jack in school!. One day there was a replacement teacher in his class!. She introduced herself to the class saying, "I am Miss Prussy!. Remember the 'r' in the name"!.

Days went by and she came back another day as replacement!. She went in front of the class and asked Jack if she remembers her!. Jack said "Yes"!.
"Alright!. Tell me what my name is" she said!.
Jack thought for a while and said, "I remember!. It's got a 'r' in it too"!.
"Wow that's great!. You remember!. You are close"
Jack kept thinking and finally said, " I got it"!.
"That's great" said the teacher awaiting his reply!.

"It is Miss Crunt" said Jack!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

A guy walking down the street sees a woman with huge breasts and offers her £100 if she lets him bite them!.
“No, are you crazy!?” she says!.
“What about for £1000!?” he asks!.
“Listen you freak" she says!. “I’m not that kind of woman!.”
“You wouldn’t even do it for £10,000!?” the man asks!.
“You’ll pay me £10,000 to bite my breasts!?” she asks!. “OK fine, lets go over to that alley!.”
Once there she takes off her blouse, and the guy begins caressing her breasts, kissing them, and fondling them!.
“So, are you gonna bite them or what!?” she huffs!.
“Nah,” he shrugs!. “Too expensive!.”
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There once was 5 people on a plane
-the Pilot
-Donald Trump
-Brittney Spears
-and a Father and his son with his little backpack
All of a sudden the plane stops in mid air begins to fall!. There are only 3 parachute packs for the 5 people!. The pilot says, " I gotta family at home see ya," and he takes a parachute and jumps out the plane!. Donald Trump says, " look i gotta important Business meeting, see ya" And he grabs a parachute pack and leaves!. Theres only one paracute pack left, and brittany yells," Look I wanna live!. Gimmie the parachute pack little boy!. The boy hands her the pack and says, " here you go!." all innocently!. The father starts to yell, " Why did u give the pack to her son!? That was our only way of escaping!" The boy replies, " I didnt give her the parachute pack dad, i gave her my backpack!."
lolWww@Enter-QA@Com

These two Polacks are digging a ditch beside the road when a pimp drives up and pulls to a halt at the stop sign!.
"Hey," says the first one, leaning on his shovel and wiping his sweaty brow, "What's he got that we ain't got!? Him with his fine clothes and his shiny car!?" Shrugging, the second one says he'll go ask!.
"What you got!?" he asks the fellow!. "You ain't no more than us, but you got yourself them fine clothes and that shiny, fine car!." And the pimp explains with an air of patient instruction, that the difference is their ignorance!.
"Ignorance!?" demands the Polack!. "What you mean, ignorance!?"
"I'll show you," says the pimp, steps off to the side of the road, holds up his hand in front of the stop sign and says, "Here!. Hit my hand!."
Puzzled but willing, the laborer winds up and swings with all his miight, but the pimp pulls his hand away at the last minute, the shovel clangs into the stop sign, then bounces back and slams into the Polack's face, knocking him to the ground!. With every sign of compassion, the pimp helps him to his feet, and concludes the lesson with a curt, "See what I mean!? Ignorance!."
"Uh-huh," replies the laborer, thanks him and returns to his fellow in the ditch!.
"What he say!?" asks the first Polack, eager to share the secret!.
"He says we got ignorance," says the first, nodding wisely, though he is still reeling!.
"Ignorance!" exclaims the student!. "What's that!?"
"I'll show you," says his bleeding pal, and holds his hand up in front of his face!. "Here!. Take that shovel and hit my hand!."Www@Enter-QA@Com

LOL i heard this pretty recently and omg! its STILL makes me laugh! hahah

Child: Mommy, Mommy but i don't wanna see Grandpa!
Mother: Shut up and keep digging

lol hope u like that 1!
=D
hav a nice day!Www@Enter-QA@Com

u r a joke!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.that is the joke!Www@Enter-QA@Com

I Don't Know Which Joke to Say U!.!.!.
Because Im Every day Hearing New Jokes in My Class From 3 Naughty friends of mine!!.!.!.!.
They R Really Really very very Funny!.!.!.!.!.
The BIG 3 ITEMS!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.lol
There Names R Aliya,Maryam & Dafter!.!.!.!.
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