Is English a Weird Language? (joke)?!


Question: Is English a Weird Language!? (joke)!?
1) The bandage was wound around the wound!.

2) The farm was used to produce produce!.

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse!.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture!.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out!.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert!.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present !.

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum!.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes!.

10) I did not object to the object!.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid!.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row !.

13) They were too close to the door to close it!.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present!.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line!.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow!.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail!.

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting, I shed a tear!.

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests!.

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend!?

21) I decided to read a red book that i have already read


Let's face it - English is a crazy language!.

There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple!.

English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France!.

But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig!. Right!?!?!?

Writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham!? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth!? One goose, 2 geese!. So one moose, 2 meese!? One index, 2 indices!? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend!? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it!?
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Answers:
Ahaha nice! I love stuff like that! All your jokes and things are really funny!!

Thanks!

A!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

English is primarily a spoken language, or more accurately a spoken mixture of adapted languages!. The written word is only an approximation!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

I forgot what those are called!. Homophones or Homonyms!.

When there are two words that are spelled the same but are pronounced differently!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

Brilliant !.!.!. Thank you!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

Very clever my friend!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

hahahaha x 1000!. That was really cool! How'd you come up with al of this!? But it's all sooo true! lol great job!Www@Enter-QA@Com

lolWww@Enter-QA@Com

holy cow thats a whole lot of stuff to get me confused!. now i will be confused all day long!. and actually guinea pigs originally came from New Guinea or something like that but i still see the point in all of that!. i have asked these questions to my friend but he doesnt get why theyre funny and contradicting cuz he always has an explanation for everything!. hes a party pooper sometimes!. but wow those are funny and so trueWww@Enter-QA@Com

YEA, I agree with you!
Some of CONFUSING ENGLISH make me headache, would u help me!? !?
1!. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP!?


2!. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks!?


3!. If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from!?


4!. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes!?


5!. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery!?


6!. Why the man who invests all your money called a broker!?


7!. If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible!?


8!. Why is it called building when it is already built!?


9!. If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success!?


10!. If you're not supposed to drink and drive, then why do bars have parking lots!?


11!. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented!?


12!. If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat!?!? Human !?!?


13!. If working hours are meant for working, then why are you reading this!?!?Www@Enter-QA@Com



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