Anyone got any good blonde jokes?!
Question: Anyone got any good blonde jokes!?
Answers:
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me!.!.!.!.!.I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started"!.
Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished!?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger!."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle!. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table!. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger"!.
He held her hand and said, "Second, I'd advise you to relax!. Let's have a cup of coffee, then !.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!." he sighed, "let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished!?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger!."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle!. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table!. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger"!.
He held her hand and said, "Second, I'd advise you to relax!. Let's have a cup of coffee, then !.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!." he sighed, "let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
Construction workers were working hard one day to tear down a large building in Chicago that had not been used for some time now!. They were trying to clear the way for a brand new skyscraper when they found a skeleton in a small closet on the 49th floor!.
After examining it they called the police!. When the police arrived they directed them to the closet and showed them the skeleton fully clothed and standing upright!. They said, “This could be Jimmy Hoffa or somebody really important!.”
After two days of hearing nothing from the police the workers decided to ask them personally to discover if the person had been famous!. They called the police and said, “We are the two guys who found the skeleton in the closet and we want to know if it was Jimmy Hoffa or somebody important!.”
The police said, “It’s not Jimmy Hoffa, but it was somebody kind of important!.”
“Well, who was it!?”
“The 1956 Blonde National Hide-and-Seek Champion!.”
Www@Enter-QA@Com
After examining it they called the police!. When the police arrived they directed them to the closet and showed them the skeleton fully clothed and standing upright!. They said, “This could be Jimmy Hoffa or somebody really important!.”
After two days of hearing nothing from the police the workers decided to ask them personally to discover if the person had been famous!. They called the police and said, “We are the two guys who found the skeleton in the closet and we want to know if it was Jimmy Hoffa or somebody important!.”
The police said, “It’s not Jimmy Hoffa, but it was somebody kind of important!.”
“Well, who was it!?”
“The 1956 Blonde National Hide-and-Seek Champion!.”
Www@Enter-QA@Com
A blonde grew up in a rural community and goes off to college!. She finds her dorm room and notices that her room mate had already arrived and unpacked!. Looking about, she spots something poking out from under the bed and picks up the roommate's personal vibrator, accidently turning it on!. Just then, the roommate walking in!.
"Hi!" says the blonde!. "I was just looking at this thing, trying to figure it what it was!."
"Haven't you ever seen one!? You stick it, um, you know!.!.!.where a guy's thing goes when you're alone together!."
"Gee, doesn't it make your teeth loose!?"
P!.S!. Hey Wolf, it's called the Jokes and Riddles forum for a reason!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
"Hi!" says the blonde!. "I was just looking at this thing, trying to figure it what it was!."
"Haven't you ever seen one!? You stick it, um, you know!.!.!.where a guy's thing goes when you're alone together!."
"Gee, doesn't it make your teeth loose!?"
P!.S!. Hey Wolf, it's called the Jokes and Riddles forum for a reason!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve!.
"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"
A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls!. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket!.
Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall!.
She showed him the instructions on the tin,
"For best results, put on two coats"!.
Www@Enter-QA@Com
"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"
A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls!. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket!.
Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall!.
She showed him the instructions on the tin,
"For best results, put on two coats"!.
Www@Enter-QA@Com
A blonde is walking past a railway line when she sees a brunette standing on the track repeating the number "23"!. The blonde then goes on the railway track and starts doing the same thing!. A train comes around the corner and the brunette jumps off leaving the blonde behind, when the train has gone the brunette gets on the line and starts saying "24"!.!.!. hmm i guess that's kinda funnyWww@Enter-QA@Com
A lawyer and a blond are sitting next to each other on a long flight!. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game!. The blond just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks!. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is really easy and a lot of fun!.
He explains,'I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and vice-versa!.'
Again, she politely declines and tries to get some sleep!. The lawyer, now somewhat agitated, says,'OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500!.'
He reckons that since she is a blond that he will easily win the match!. This offer catches the blond's attention and, realizing that there will probably be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game!.
The lawyer asks the first question!. 'What's the distance from the earth to the moon!?'
The blond doesn't say a word, reaches in to her purse, pulls out a $5 note and hands it to the lawyer!. Now, it's the blond's turn!.
She asks the lawyer,'What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four!?'
The lawyer looks at her with a puzzled look!. He takes out his laptop computer and searches the Net and the Library of Congress!. Frustrated, he sends emails to all his co-workers and friends he knows!. All to no avail!. After over an hour, he wakes the blond and hands her $500!. The blond politely takes the $500 and turns away to get back to sleep!.
The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blond and asks,'Well, so what is the answer!?'
Without a word, the blond reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks!.
The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks!."
The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks!."
The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks!."
The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them!.
(hehe)Www@Enter-QA@Com
The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks!."
The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks!."
The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks!."
The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them!.
(hehe)Www@Enter-QA@Com
two blondes were on their way to disney world!. they were so excited and couldnt wait to finally get there!. they were getting closer and closer and finally reached the sign that said "Disney - Left" !. in their disappointment!.!.they turned around and went home!.
how do you make a blonde drown!? put a scratch n sniff sticker on the bottom of a pool!.
:-)Www@Enter-QA@Com
how do you make a blonde drown!? put a scratch n sniff sticker on the bottom of a pool!.
:-)Www@Enter-QA@Com
Blonde goes into PC World and asks for some curtains!. 'Why do you want curtains for your computer!?' asks salesman!. 'Hello!?!?' says the blonde, 'Ive got windows!'Www@Enter-QA@Com
A Blonde is in court for a crime!. The Judge says "order order" and the blonde says "burger and chips"!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
What do you call a blonde with a zit on her ars3!?
BRAIN TUMOR!!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
BRAIN TUMOR!!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
A blonde walks into a bar!.!.!.!.!. ouch!Www@Enter-QA@Com
I think you have the wrong idea about Yahoo Answers, its meant for answering a question you might have, not opinions and jokes and stuff!.Www@Enter-QA@Com