Original Chuck Norris facts?!
Question: Original Chuck Norris facts!?
Does anybody know any original Chuck Norris facts!? Like ones that you made up yourselves and not a whole lot of people have heard yet!?Www@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did
Chuck Norris is Luke Skywalker's real father
Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood!. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat!. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't **** with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf!.
When Chuck Norris' wife burned the turkey one thanksgiving, Chuck said, "don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard!. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce!. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris!."
To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer!. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes!. Beat that, Lance Armstrong!.
On the 7th day, God rested!.!.!.!. Chuck Norris took over
When Chuck Norris was denied a Bacon McMuffin at McDonalds because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a KFC
Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99!.9 percent of germs!. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the f**k he wants!.
"The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once!. ONCE!."
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris!.
On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun!.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one!.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes
Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order!.
Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck NorrisWww@Enter-QA@Com
Chuck Norris is Luke Skywalker's real father
Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood!. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat!. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't **** with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf!.
When Chuck Norris' wife burned the turkey one thanksgiving, Chuck said, "don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard!. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce!. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris!."
To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer!. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes!. Beat that, Lance Armstrong!.
On the 7th day, God rested!.!.!.!. Chuck Norris took over
When Chuck Norris was denied a Bacon McMuffin at McDonalds because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a KFC
Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99!.9 percent of germs!. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the f**k he wants!.
"The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once!. ONCE!."
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris!.
On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun!.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one!.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes
Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order!.
Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck NorrisWww@Enter-QA@Com
if chuck norris is running late, time better slow the hell down!.
chuck norris visited the Virgin Islands!. now they're just referred to as The Islands!.
my personal favorite is: chuck norris can talk about fight club!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
chuck norris visited the Virgin Islands!. now they're just referred to as The Islands!.
my personal favorite is: chuck norris can talk about fight club!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
chuck norris tears can cure cancer, too bad he never cries!.
chuck norris can make a girl climax just by walking into a room!.
chuck norris actually has another fist behind his beard!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
chuck norris can make a girl climax just by walking into a room!.
chuck norris actually has another fist behind his beard!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
They once tried to sell toilet paper with Chuck Norris's image on it!.
It failed, because Chuck Norris doesn't take s!.hit from anyone!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
It failed, because Chuck Norris doesn't take s!.hit from anyone!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Chuck Norris eats bullets for breakfast and kills people by farting!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
I don't tell Chuck Norris jokes!. If he got offended and came after me I would have to kill him!.Www@Enter-QA@Com