Does any one know any cute senior jokes?!
Question: Does any one know any cute senior jokes!?
Answers:
An old man, went to the doctor to get a physical!.
A few days later, he was seen walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm!.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to him and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you!?"
He replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful!.'"
The doctor said, "I didn't say that!. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful!."
did you hear about the old lady that hated flies until she opened one
You know you are getting old when your back goes out more often than you do!.
You know when you are getting old; when you bend down to tie your shoe laces you look arouind to see what else you can do while you are down there!.
An old woman walks into a singles bar looking for a little action!. A distinguished older gentleman approaches her and they really hit it off!. After a few drinks they decide to get a hotel room and get it on!. As they sit naked on the bed, the old man takes out his hearing aids and moves in!. The old woman stops him and says, "before we do this, i should tell you i have acute angina!." The old man looks at her, smiles and says, I sure hope so, cause you got ugly boobs!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
A few days later, he was seen walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm!.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to him and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you!?"
He replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful!.'"
The doctor said, "I didn't say that!. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful!."
did you hear about the old lady that hated flies until she opened one
You know you are getting old when your back goes out more often than you do!.
You know when you are getting old; when you bend down to tie your shoe laces you look arouind to see what else you can do while you are down there!.
An old woman walks into a singles bar looking for a little action!. A distinguished older gentleman approaches her and they really hit it off!. After a few drinks they decide to get a hotel room and get it on!. As they sit naked on the bed, the old man takes out his hearing aids and moves in!. The old woman stops him and says, "before we do this, i should tell you i have acute angina!." The old man looks at her, smiles and says, I sure hope so, cause you got ugly boobs!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
Little Johnny's father asked him, "Do you know about the birds and the bees!?"
"I don't want to know!" little Johnny said, bursting into tears!.
Confused, the father asked little Johnny what was wrong!.
"Oh dad," Little Johnny sobbed, "At age six I got the 'there's no Santa' speech!. At age seven I got the 'there's no Easter bunny' speech!. Then at age 8 you hit me with the 'there's no tooth fairy' speech! If you're going to tell me now that grown-ups don't really ****, I've got nothing left to live for!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
"I don't want to know!" little Johnny said, bursting into tears!.
Confused, the father asked little Johnny what was wrong!.
"Oh dad," Little Johnny sobbed, "At age six I got the 'there's no Santa' speech!. At age seven I got the 'there's no Easter bunny' speech!. Then at age 8 you hit me with the 'there's no tooth fairy' speech! If you're going to tell me now that grown-ups don't really ****, I've got nothing left to live for!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
A few months after his parents were divorced, little Johnny passed by his mom's bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, "I need a man, I need a man!"
Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times!.
One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning!. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her!.
Little Johnny ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning, "Ohh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times!.
One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning!. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her!.
Little Johnny ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning, "Ohh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
Hard Of Hearing
An elderly couple was driving cross-country, and the woman was driving!.
She gets pulled over by the highway patrol!.
The officer says, "Ma'am, did you know you were speeding!?"
The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say!?"
The old man yells, "HE SAYS YOU WERE SPEEDING!."
The patrolman says, "May I see your license!?"
The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say!?"
The old man yells, "HE WANTS TO SEE YOUR LICENSE!."
The woman gives him her license!.
The patrolman says, "I see you are from Arkansas!. I spent some time there once, had the worst sex with a woman I have ever had!."
The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say!?"
"HE THINKS HE KNOWS YOU," the old man yells!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
An elderly couple was driving cross-country, and the woman was driving!.
She gets pulled over by the highway patrol!.
The officer says, "Ma'am, did you know you were speeding!?"
The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say!?"
The old man yells, "HE SAYS YOU WERE SPEEDING!."
The patrolman says, "May I see your license!?"
The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say!?"
The old man yells, "HE WANTS TO SEE YOUR LICENSE!."
The woman gives him her license!.
The patrolman says, "I see you are from Arkansas!. I spent some time there once, had the worst sex with a woman I have ever had!."
The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say!?"
"HE THINKS HE KNOWS YOU," the old man yells!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
90yr old man and 18yr old girl in a hotel!.!.!.as they were going up the stairs the porter says " aint you worried about a heart attack!?"!.!.!.!.
The old mans says " Son, If she dies, she dies"!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
The old mans says " Son, If she dies, she dies"!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
WII GET BACKWww@Enter-QA@Com