I need some good jokes?!
Question: I need some good jokes!?
Im mc ing music night at my school and i need good clean jokes!. Musical ones would be preferable!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
head pharmacist goes out to lunch leaving the assistant pharmacist in charge!.When the head pharmacist returns from lunch he notices a man leaning against the wall!.He asked the assistant what was wrong with the man leaning against the wall over there!.The assistant pharmacist says,"Oh that guy!.Oh yeah he came in a little while ago with a really bad cough so I sold him a laxative!.He seems to be doing ok now!.!.!.!.!. I guess!." The head pharmacist says,"Are you crazy!?!? You can't sell a laxative to someone who has a bad cough like that!!?" The assistant pharmacist says "Well why not!?!? Look at him over there! Its working! He's too scared to cough now!!!.!.!.!.!."
A bus stops and 2 men get on with really strong accents!. They sit down and
have a conversation!.
The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first,
but all of a sudden when she hears one of them say the following:
"Emma come first!. Den I come!. Den two esses acoma together!. I
come once-a-more!. Two esses, they comma together again!. I
come again and pee twice!. Then I come one lasta time!."
"You dirty-mouth pigs," yelled the lady
!.” In this country !. !. !. we don't speak dirty in
public places about our sex lives!. !. !. "
"Hey, relax lady whats sa-matter for you!?," said the man!. "Who talkin' abouta
sex!?
I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spell 'Mississippi'!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
A bus stops and 2 men get on with really strong accents!. They sit down and
have a conversation!.
The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first,
but all of a sudden when she hears one of them say the following:
"Emma come first!. Den I come!. Den two esses acoma together!. I
come once-a-more!. Two esses, they comma together again!. I
come again and pee twice!. Then I come one lasta time!."
"You dirty-mouth pigs," yelled the lady
!.” In this country !. !. !. we don't speak dirty in
public places about our sex lives!. !. !. "
"Hey, relax lady whats sa-matter for you!?," said the man!. "Who talkin' abouta
sex!?
I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spell 'Mississippi'!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
Glossary of music terms
Lauda: The difference between shawms and krummhorns
Longa: The time between visits with Vire!.
Major Triad: The name of the head of the Music Department!. (Minor Triad: the name of the wife of the head of the Music Department!.)
Mean-Tone Temperament: One's state of mind when everybody's trying to tune at the same time!.
Messiah: An oratorio by Handel performed every Christmas by choirs that believe they are good enough, in cooperation with musicians who need the money!.
etronome: A dwarf who lives in the city!.
Minim: The time you spend with Vire when there is a long line!. Breve: The time you spend when the line is short!.
Minnesinger: A boy soprano or Mickey's girlfriend in the opera!.
Modulation: "Nothing is bad in modulation!."
Q: What do you get when you play a new age song backwards!?
A: A new age song!.
Q: What happens if you sing country music backwards!?
A: You get your job and your wife back!.
Disco is to music what Etch-A-Sketch is to art!.
Q: How can you tell someone is a true music lover!?
A: When they even put their ear up to the bathroom keyhole!.
After silence, music comes closest to expressing the inexpressible!.
Music is the only sensual pleasure without vice!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Lauda: The difference between shawms and krummhorns
Longa: The time between visits with Vire!.
Major Triad: The name of the head of the Music Department!. (Minor Triad: the name of the wife of the head of the Music Department!.)
Mean-Tone Temperament: One's state of mind when everybody's trying to tune at the same time!.
Messiah: An oratorio by Handel performed every Christmas by choirs that believe they are good enough, in cooperation with musicians who need the money!.
etronome: A dwarf who lives in the city!.
Minim: The time you spend with Vire when there is a long line!. Breve: The time you spend when the line is short!.
Minnesinger: A boy soprano or Mickey's girlfriend in the opera!.
Modulation: "Nothing is bad in modulation!."
Q: What do you get when you play a new age song backwards!?
A: A new age song!.
Q: What happens if you sing country music backwards!?
A: You get your job and your wife back!.
Disco is to music what Etch-A-Sketch is to art!.
Q: How can you tell someone is a true music lover!?
A: When they even put their ear up to the bathroom keyhole!.
After silence, music comes closest to expressing the inexpressible!.
Music is the only sensual pleasure without vice!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
I had a dream last night that
Chris Brown, Lil Wayne, and Ne-yo died
Wanna Know how!?
Chis Brown couldn't get any air
Lil Wayne choked on a lollypop
and some one turned off Ne-yo's radioWww@Enter-QA@Com
Chris Brown, Lil Wayne, and Ne-yo died
Wanna Know how!?
Chis Brown couldn't get any air
Lil Wayne choked on a lollypop
and some one turned off Ne-yo's radioWww@Enter-QA@Com