Any one know little johnny jokes?!
Question: Any one know little johnny jokes!?
Answers:
Little Johnny’s kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals!. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person!.
"Yes," said the policeman!. "The detectives want very badly to capture him!."
Little Johnny asked, "Why didn’t you keep him when you took his picture!?"
A third grade teacher asked her students to use the word "fascinate" in
a
sentence!.
Molly said!. "My family went to the New York City Zoo and we saw all the
animals!. It was fascinating!."
The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word
"fascinate"!.
Sally raised her hand!. She said, "My family went to the Statue of
Liberty
and I was fascinated!."
The teacher said, "Well, that was good, Sally, but I want the word
’fascinate!.’"
Johnny raised his hand!. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was noted
for
his bad language!. She finally decided there was no way he could damage
the
word ’fascinate’, so she called on him!.
Johnny said, "My sister has a sweater with ten buttons, but her **** are
so
big, she can only fasten eight!."
The teacher told the class that today they’d be guessing objects from physical description!. She said, "I will hold an object under my desk and physically describe it to you, and then class, you have to tell me what you think it is I have under my desk!." First the teacher said, "I have something long and yellow, what is it!?" Sally raises her hand and the teacher calls on her, "What do you think it is Sally!?" "It’s a banana", replied Sally!. "No, it’s a pencil" said the teacher, "But I like the way you think!." Next the teacher said, "I’m holding something round and red, what is it!?" Billy raises his hand and the teacher calls on him, "What do you think it is Billy!?" "It’s a tomato" says Billy!. "No, it’s an apple" says the teacher, "but I like the way you think!." Little Johnny raises his hand so the teacher calls on him and says, "Yes Little Johnny!." "Well Ms!. Smith, I have one for you" says Little Johnny!. "Okay says the teacher!." "What’s round, hard, and has a head!?" replied Little Johnny!. "Oh no, Little Johnny that is not appropriate for school at all!." says the teacher!. "It’s a quarter" says Little Johnny, "but I like the way you think!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
"Yes," said the policeman!. "The detectives want very badly to capture him!."
Little Johnny asked, "Why didn’t you keep him when you took his picture!?"
A third grade teacher asked her students to use the word "fascinate" in
a
sentence!.
Molly said!. "My family went to the New York City Zoo and we saw all the
animals!. It was fascinating!."
The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word
"fascinate"!.
Sally raised her hand!. She said, "My family went to the Statue of
Liberty
and I was fascinated!."
The teacher said, "Well, that was good, Sally, but I want the word
’fascinate!.’"
Johnny raised his hand!. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was noted
for
his bad language!. She finally decided there was no way he could damage
the
word ’fascinate’, so she called on him!.
Johnny said, "My sister has a sweater with ten buttons, but her **** are
so
big, she can only fasten eight!."
The teacher told the class that today they’d be guessing objects from physical description!. She said, "I will hold an object under my desk and physically describe it to you, and then class, you have to tell me what you think it is I have under my desk!." First the teacher said, "I have something long and yellow, what is it!?" Sally raises her hand and the teacher calls on her, "What do you think it is Sally!?" "It’s a banana", replied Sally!. "No, it’s a pencil" said the teacher, "But I like the way you think!." Next the teacher said, "I’m holding something round and red, what is it!?" Billy raises his hand and the teacher calls on him, "What do you think it is Billy!?" "It’s a tomato" says Billy!. "No, it’s an apple" says the teacher, "but I like the way you think!." Little Johnny raises his hand so the teacher calls on him and says, "Yes Little Johnny!." "Well Ms!. Smith, I have one for you" says Little Johnny!. "Okay says the teacher!." "What’s round, hard, and has a head!?" replied Little Johnny!. "Oh no, Little Johnny that is not appropriate for school at all!." says the teacher!. "It’s a quarter" says Little Johnny, "but I like the way you think!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
Little Johnny sees his mother walk out of the shower and sees her vagina!.
He asks her what it is and she embarassed replies, "Oh, that's mommy's black sponge!."
A few days later, Johnny spills a glass of milk on the floor and says, "Mommy, I need your black sponge to mop up the milk!"
She replies, "I lost it, honey!."
A couple of days later, he comes running up to her and says, "Mommy, I found your black sponge!" Mystified, she says, "Where, honey!?"
Little Johnny says, "It's over at Mrs!. Johnson's house, and Daddy's washing his face in it!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
He asks her what it is and she embarassed replies, "Oh, that's mommy's black sponge!."
A few days later, Johnny spills a glass of milk on the floor and says, "Mommy, I need your black sponge to mop up the milk!"
She replies, "I lost it, honey!."
A couple of days later, he comes running up to her and says, "Mommy, I found your black sponge!" Mystified, she says, "Where, honey!?"
Little Johnny says, "It's over at Mrs!. Johnson's house, and Daddy's washing his face in it!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
little johnny walks in the bedroom and sees his dad sh**ing his mum!. his dad just laughs at him and johnny runs out crying!. a bit later his dad hears noises coming from johnny's room!. he looks in and sees little johnny sh**ing his granny little johnny looks round and says "it's not so funny now when it's YOUR mum"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Little April was asleep in class so the teacher decided to try catch her!? She asks “Tell me April ,who created the universe!?”
When April didn’t stir her friend little Johnny jabbed her in the back with a pen!. “GOD ALMIGHTY!!” shouted April!.
A little later the teacher asks her "Who is our saviour!?” Johnny again prods her with a pen and April shouts "JESUS CHRIST!!"!. The teacher was determined to catch her asleep and asks "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her 23rd child!?”
Johnny again comes to the rescue and jabs April who screams "IF YOU STICK THAT F**KING THING IN ME ONCE MORE,ILL BREAK IT IN HALF AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ****:::!!!
The teacher fainted!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.
Little Johnny's neighbors had a baby!. Unfortunately the baby, was born without ears!. When the mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnny's family was invited over to see the baby!.
Before they left their house, Little Johnny's dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears!. His dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the baby's missing ears or even said the word "ears" he would get the spanking of his life when they came back home!. Little Johnny told his dad he understood completely!. When Johnny looked in the crib he said," What a beautiful baby!."
The mother said, "Why, thank you, Little Johnny!."
Johnny said, "He has beautiful little feet and beautiful little hands, cute little nose and really beautiful eyes!. Can he see!?"
"Yes, the mother replied, "we are so thankful!. The doctor said he will have 20/20 vision "
"That's great," said little Johnny, "cuz he'd be s h i t-outta-luck if he needed glasses!"
Teacher: "Four crows are on the fence!. The farmer shoots one!. How many are left!?"
Little Johnny: "None!."
Teacher: "Listen carefully: Four crows are on the fence!. The farmer shoots one!. How many are left!?"
Little Johnny: "None!."
Teacher: "Can you explain that answer!?"
Little Johnny: "One is shot, the others fly away!. There are none left!."
Teacher: "Well, that isn't the correct answer, but I like the way you think"
Little Johnny: "Teacher, can I ask a question!?"
Teacher: "Sure!."
Little Johnny: "There are three women at the ice cream parlor!. One is licking, one is biting and one is sucking her ice cream cone!. Which one is married!?"
Teacher: "The one sucking the cone!."
Little Johnny; "No!. The one with the wedding ring on, but I like the way you think!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
When April didn’t stir her friend little Johnny jabbed her in the back with a pen!. “GOD ALMIGHTY!!” shouted April!.
A little later the teacher asks her "Who is our saviour!?” Johnny again prods her with a pen and April shouts "JESUS CHRIST!!"!. The teacher was determined to catch her asleep and asks "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her 23rd child!?”
Johnny again comes to the rescue and jabs April who screams "IF YOU STICK THAT F**KING THING IN ME ONCE MORE,ILL BREAK IT IN HALF AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ****:::!!!
The teacher fainted!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.
Little Johnny's neighbors had a baby!. Unfortunately the baby, was born without ears!. When the mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnny's family was invited over to see the baby!.
Before they left their house, Little Johnny's dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears!. His dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the baby's missing ears or even said the word "ears" he would get the spanking of his life when they came back home!. Little Johnny told his dad he understood completely!. When Johnny looked in the crib he said," What a beautiful baby!."
The mother said, "Why, thank you, Little Johnny!."
Johnny said, "He has beautiful little feet and beautiful little hands, cute little nose and really beautiful eyes!. Can he see!?"
"Yes, the mother replied, "we are so thankful!. The doctor said he will have 20/20 vision "
"That's great," said little Johnny, "cuz he'd be s h i t-outta-luck if he needed glasses!"
Teacher: "Four crows are on the fence!. The farmer shoots one!. How many are left!?"
Little Johnny: "None!."
Teacher: "Listen carefully: Four crows are on the fence!. The farmer shoots one!. How many are left!?"
Little Johnny: "None!."
Teacher: "Can you explain that answer!?"
Little Johnny: "One is shot, the others fly away!. There are none left!."
Teacher: "Well, that isn't the correct answer, but I like the way you think"
Little Johnny: "Teacher, can I ask a question!?"
Teacher: "Sure!."
Little Johnny: "There are three women at the ice cream parlor!. One is licking, one is biting and one is sucking her ice cream cone!. Which one is married!?"
Teacher: "The one sucking the cone!."
Little Johnny; "No!. The one with the wedding ring on, but I like the way you think!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
area51newmexico!.com lil johnny jokes on there!. and there goods onesWww@Enter-QA@Com
Little Johnnie didn't tell me any!.Www@Enter-QA@Com