Drunk again..?!
Question: Drunk again!.!.!?
Dave came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep!. He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep!.
When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white Robe!.
Who the hell are you!?" demanded Dave, "and what are you doing in my bedroom!?"
The mysterious man answered "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St Peter!."
Dave was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!?!! That can't be, I have so much to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family!. !. !. you've got to send me back straight away!."
St Peter replied "Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch!. We
can only send you back as a dog or a hen!."
Dave was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen!. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground!.
This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strangeWww@Enter-QA@Com
When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white Robe!.
Who the hell are you!?" demanded Dave, "and what are you doing in my bedroom!?"
The mysterious man answered "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St Peter!."
Dave was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!?!! That can't be, I have so much to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family!. !. !. you've got to send me back straight away!."
St Peter replied "Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch!. We
can only send you back as a dog or a hen!."
Dave was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen!. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground!.
This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strangeWww@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
lmao good one
a guy goes into a bar and sits beside a big lady!.he says to her boy u have a big a$$!.!.!.she goes!.!.!.why you!.!.!.!.!.and starts smacking him around!.he goes in the mens room!.!.!.fixes him self up!.!.!.!.combs/fixes his hair!.!.!.!.!.straightens out his glasses!.!.!.puts his teeth back in etc!. He goes back and sits beside the same lady!.He says to her!.!.!.!.boy u got small boobs!.!.!.!.!.she says do i really!.!.!.hes says yeah and i know how u can make em biger!.She says how!. He says you go into the ladies room,take your bra and shirt off!.!.!.!.take a whole bunch of toilet paper and keep wiping and rubbing between your boobs!.!.!.she says omg!.!.!.do u think thatll really work for me/ He says why wouldnt it!.!.!.it worked on your big a$$ didnt it!.!.!.!.!.
so theres this doctor that did circumcisions!.After many years he decides its time to retire!.All the circumsicions he did over the years,he saved the foreskins!.He took the big garbag full of foreskins to his friend who works at a leather company!.He says"Make me something nice out of these foreskins,cuz im retiring!." His friend says"Come back in 2 weeks and ill have something nice for you!."So he goes in 2 weeks to see what his friend made him!.When he shows up 2 weeks later,his friend presents him with 5 nice wallets!. He says to his friend"wallets!!? Is that all i get after all these years!!?" His friend says"Relax my friend!.You see its not just ordinary wallets!. After to rub them for a while,it becomes a 5 piece luggage set!."
The head pharmacist goes out to lunch leaving the assistant pharmacist in charge!.When the head pharmacist returns from lunch he notices a man leaning against the wall!.He asked the assistant what was wrong with the man leaning against the wall over there!.The assistant pharmacist says,"Oh that guy!.Oh yeah he came in a little while ago with a really bad cough so I sold him a laxative!.He seems to be doing ok now!.!.!.!.!. I guess!." The head pharmacist says,"Are you crazy!?!? You can't sell a laxative to someone who has a bad cough like that!!?" The assistant pharmacist says "Well why not!?!? Look at him over there! Its working! He's too scared to cough now!!!.!.!.!.!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
a guy goes into a bar and sits beside a big lady!.he says to her boy u have a big a$$!.!.!.she goes!.!.!.why you!.!.!.!.!.and starts smacking him around!.he goes in the mens room!.!.!.fixes him self up!.!.!.!.combs/fixes his hair!.!.!.!.!.straightens out his glasses!.!.!.puts his teeth back in etc!. He goes back and sits beside the same lady!.He says to her!.!.!.!.boy u got small boobs!.!.!.!.!.she says do i really!.!.!.hes says yeah and i know how u can make em biger!.She says how!. He says you go into the ladies room,take your bra and shirt off!.!.!.!.take a whole bunch of toilet paper and keep wiping and rubbing between your boobs!.!.!.she says omg!.!.!.do u think thatll really work for me/ He says why wouldnt it!.!.!.it worked on your big a$$ didnt it!.!.!.!.!.
so theres this doctor that did circumcisions!.After many years he decides its time to retire!.All the circumsicions he did over the years,he saved the foreskins!.He took the big garbag full of foreskins to his friend who works at a leather company!.He says"Make me something nice out of these foreskins,cuz im retiring!." His friend says"Come back in 2 weeks and ill have something nice for you!."So he goes in 2 weeks to see what his friend made him!.When he shows up 2 weeks later,his friend presents him with 5 nice wallets!. He says to his friend"wallets!!? Is that all i get after all these years!!?" His friend says"Relax my friend!.You see its not just ordinary wallets!. After to rub them for a while,it becomes a 5 piece luggage set!."
The head pharmacist goes out to lunch leaving the assistant pharmacist in charge!.When the head pharmacist returns from lunch he notices a man leaning against the wall!.He asked the assistant what was wrong with the man leaning against the wall over there!.The assistant pharmacist says,"Oh that guy!.Oh yeah he came in a little while ago with a really bad cough so I sold him a laxative!.He seems to be doing ok now!.!.!.!.!. I guess!." The head pharmacist says,"Are you crazy!?!? You can't sell a laxative to someone who has a bad cough like that!!?" The assistant pharmacist says "Well why not!?!? Look at him over there! Its working! He's too scared to cough now!!!.!.!.!.!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA LIKE IT!!!!!!!!!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
LMAO! Ewww!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Awwwwwwwwright!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
hahahahahahahahahahahaWww@Enter-QA@Com
hahaha! good one!!! A STAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
So funny! That one caught me off guard, good stuff!Www@Enter-QA@Com
ha ha haWww@Enter-QA@Com
lol thats funnyWww@Enter-QA@Com
That's good!. I was not expecting that ending at all!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
lolz!
that was EPIC!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
that was EPIC!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
hahah that is so grossWww@Enter-QA@Com