Who would be kind enough to tell me some blonde jokes? I used to be blonde and I!
Question: Who would be kind enough to tell me some blonde jokes!? I used to be blonde and I love them!?
Answers:
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who attempted to drive to EuroDisney!?
A: She saw a sign saying: "EuroDisney Left" so she went home!.
Did you hear about the blonde who put under Education on her job application, 'Hooked On Phonics'!.!.!.
Q: What did the blonde girl name her pet Zebra!?
A: Spot!.
Q: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back!?
A: From crawling across the street when the pedestrian sign said "DON'T WALK"!.
Q: What does a blonde Owl say!?
A: What, what!?
Q: What do you see when you look directly into a blonde's eyes!?
A: The back of her head!.
Q: What did the Dumb Blonde do when she went to a film that had an NC-17 (no under 17's) rating!? A: Went home and got 16 friends!.
Q: What do you call a blond behind a steering wheel!?
A: An air bag!.
Q: How do you tell if a blonde writes Mysteries!?
A: She's got a checkbook!.
Q: How can you tell a FAX has been sent from a blonde!?
A: There's a stamp on it!.
Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird!?
A: Threw it off a cliff!.
Q: Why can't blondes put in light bulbs!?
A: Keep breakin em' with hammers!.
Q: What's the difference between blondes and McDonald's!?
A: A blonde serves more people in a night!.
Q: What happens when a blonde developes Alzheimers!?
A: Her IQ goes up!.
Q: Why are there no dumb brunettes!?
A: Peroxide!.
Q: What's the guaranteed method to totally confuse a Blonde Man!?
A: Ask him to alphabetise a King-size bag of M&Ms!.
Q: Why did the blonde drive into the ditch!?
A: To turn the blinker off!.
Q: When is it legal to shoot a blonde in the head!?
A: When you have a tire pump to reinflate it!.
Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blondes head!?
A: A Space Invader!.
Q: What's the difference between a dumb blonde and a supermarket trolley!?
A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own!.
Q: How can you tell if a blonde is a good cook!?
A: Manages to get the Pop Tarts out the toaster in one piece!.
Q: What do you call a blonde between two brunettes!?
A: A mental block!.
LOLWww@Enter-QA@Com
A: She saw a sign saying: "EuroDisney Left" so she went home!.
Did you hear about the blonde who put under Education on her job application, 'Hooked On Phonics'!.!.!.
Q: What did the blonde girl name her pet Zebra!?
A: Spot!.
Q: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back!?
A: From crawling across the street when the pedestrian sign said "DON'T WALK"!.
Q: What does a blonde Owl say!?
A: What, what!?
Q: What do you see when you look directly into a blonde's eyes!?
A: The back of her head!.
Q: What did the Dumb Blonde do when she went to a film that had an NC-17 (no under 17's) rating!? A: Went home and got 16 friends!.
Q: What do you call a blond behind a steering wheel!?
A: An air bag!.
Q: How do you tell if a blonde writes Mysteries!?
A: She's got a checkbook!.
Q: How can you tell a FAX has been sent from a blonde!?
A: There's a stamp on it!.
Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird!?
A: Threw it off a cliff!.
Q: Why can't blondes put in light bulbs!?
A: Keep breakin em' with hammers!.
Q: What's the difference between blondes and McDonald's!?
A: A blonde serves more people in a night!.
Q: What happens when a blonde developes Alzheimers!?
A: Her IQ goes up!.
Q: Why are there no dumb brunettes!?
A: Peroxide!.
Q: What's the guaranteed method to totally confuse a Blonde Man!?
A: Ask him to alphabetise a King-size bag of M&Ms!.
Q: Why did the blonde drive into the ditch!?
A: To turn the blinker off!.
Q: When is it legal to shoot a blonde in the head!?
A: When you have a tire pump to reinflate it!.
Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blondes head!?
A: A Space Invader!.
Q: What's the difference between a dumb blonde and a supermarket trolley!?
A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own!.
Q: How can you tell if a blonde is a good cook!?
A: Manages to get the Pop Tarts out the toaster in one piece!.
Q: What do you call a blonde between two brunettes!?
A: A mental block!.
LOLWww@Enter-QA@Com
A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve!.
"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"
======================================!.!.!.
A blonde cop stops blonde motorist and asks for her driving license!.
The Motorist scuffles around in her purse and can't find it!. She says to the cop, "I must have left it at home officer!."
The cop says, "Well, do you have any kind of identification!?" The motorist scuffles around in her purse again, and finds a pocket mirror!.
She looks at it and says to the cop, "All I have is this picture of myself!." The cop says, "Let me see it, then!." So the blonde motorist gives the mirror to the blonde cop, who looks at it, and replies, "Well, if I had known you were a police officer, I wouldn't have eWww@Enter-QA@Com
"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"
======================================!.!.!.
A blonde cop stops blonde motorist and asks for her driving license!.
The Motorist scuffles around in her purse and can't find it!. She says to the cop, "I must have left it at home officer!."
The cop says, "Well, do you have any kind of identification!?" The motorist scuffles around in her purse again, and finds a pocket mirror!.
She looks at it and says to the cop, "All I have is this picture of myself!." The cop says, "Let me see it, then!." So the blonde motorist gives the mirror to the blonde cop, who looks at it, and replies, "Well, if I had known you were a police officer, I wouldn't have eWww@Enter-QA@Com
There is a blonde and brunnette lost in the desert!. The blonde is carrying a car door and the brunette is carrying a watermelon!. The blonde asks the brunette "Why are you carrying a watermelon, the brunette says "When it gets hot i am going to crack it open and drink all the juice!. Why are you carrying a car door!?" the blonde replies "when it gets hot i am going to roll down the window!." ha ha ha!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane!?
She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much
These 2 blonde girls drove to Disneyland!.They saw a sign that said "Disneyland Left" So they went left and went back home!.
They found 2 blonde girls frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theatre!. They went to see "Closed For The Winter"!.
why cant blondes make kool-aid
they cant figure out how they get 8 cups water in the koolaid packet
Did you hear about the blonde that was fired at the M&M company!?
They caught her throwing away all the W'S!.
Doctor (using a stethoscope): "Big breaths!."
Blond: Yeth!. And I'm not even thickteen yet
why did the blonde get square boobs
she forgot 2 take the kleenix out of the box
Q: Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane!?
A: She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much!.
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up!?
A: To catch as much as they can that is over their heads!.
Q: Why is it good to have a blonde passenger!?
A: You can park in the handicap zone!.
Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes light up!?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear!.
Q: Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks!?
A: It takes too long to retrain them!.
Q: How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer!?
A: There's white-out on the screen!.
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a computer!?
A: You only have to punch information into a computer once!.
Q: Why don't blondes eat pickles!?
A: Because they can't get their head in the jar!.
Q: Why do Blondes like the GST!? (GST -- Goods and Services Tax)
A: Because they can spell it!.
Q: What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant!?
A: "Are you sure it's mine!?"Www@Enter-QA@Com
She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much
These 2 blonde girls drove to Disneyland!.They saw a sign that said "Disneyland Left" So they went left and went back home!.
They found 2 blonde girls frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theatre!. They went to see "Closed For The Winter"!.
why cant blondes make kool-aid
they cant figure out how they get 8 cups water in the koolaid packet
Did you hear about the blonde that was fired at the M&M company!?
They caught her throwing away all the W'S!.
Doctor (using a stethoscope): "Big breaths!."
Blond: Yeth!. And I'm not even thickteen yet
why did the blonde get square boobs
she forgot 2 take the kleenix out of the box
Q: Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane!?
A: She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much!.
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up!?
A: To catch as much as they can that is over their heads!.
Q: Why is it good to have a blonde passenger!?
A: You can park in the handicap zone!.
Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes light up!?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear!.
Q: Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks!?
A: It takes too long to retrain them!.
Q: How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer!?
A: There's white-out on the screen!.
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a computer!?
A: You only have to punch information into a computer once!.
Q: Why don't blondes eat pickles!?
A: Because they can't get their head in the jar!.
Q: Why do Blondes like the GST!? (GST -- Goods and Services Tax)
A: Because they can spell it!.
Q: What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant!?
A: "Are you sure it's mine!?"Www@Enter-QA@Com
Three blondes are in an elevator when the elevator suddenly stops and the lights go out!. They try using their cell phones to get help, but have no luck!. Even the phones are out!.
After a few hours of being stuck with no help in sight, one blonde says to the others "I think the best way to call for help is by yelling together!."
The others agree with the first, so they all inhale deeply and begin to yell loudly "Together, together, together!."
There was this bar and in the bar there was a magic mirror!.
If you told a lie it would suck you in!.
One day a brunette walked into this bar!. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world' and it sucked her in!.
The next day a redhead walked into the bar!. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world' and it sucked her in!.
Then the next day a blond walked into the bar!. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think!.!.!.' and it sucked her in!.
Q: What do you call an eternity!?
A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop!.
Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes!?
A: Toes Go In First!.
Q: What do SMART Blondes and UFOs have in common!?
A: You always hear about them but never see them!.
Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms!?
A: They think their picture is being taken!.
Sally goes to work one morning crying her eyes out!. Her boss, concerned his employee, walks over to her and asks sympathetically, "What's the matter!?" The blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call that my mother had passed away!."
The boss, feeling very sorry at this point suggests to the young girl, "Why don't you go home for the day!.!.!.we aren't terribly busy!. Just take
the day off and go relax!."
Sally very calmly states, "No I'd be better off here!. I need to keep my mind busy and I have the best chance of doing that here!."
The boss agrees and allows her to work as usual!. "If you need anything just let me know" says the boss!.
A few hours pass and the boss decides to check on Sally!. He looks out his office and sees her crying hysterically!.
He rushes over an asks, "What's the matter now!? Are you going to be ok!?"
Sally breaks down in tears!. "I just received a horrible call from my sister!. She said that her mom died too!!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
After a few hours of being stuck with no help in sight, one blonde says to the others "I think the best way to call for help is by yelling together!."
The others agree with the first, so they all inhale deeply and begin to yell loudly "Together, together, together!."
There was this bar and in the bar there was a magic mirror!.
If you told a lie it would suck you in!.
One day a brunette walked into this bar!. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world' and it sucked her in!.
The next day a redhead walked into the bar!. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world' and it sucked her in!.
Then the next day a blond walked into the bar!. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think!.!.!.' and it sucked her in!.
Q: What do you call an eternity!?
A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop!.
Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes!?
A: Toes Go In First!.
Q: What do SMART Blondes and UFOs have in common!?
A: You always hear about them but never see them!.
Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms!?
A: They think their picture is being taken!.
Sally goes to work one morning crying her eyes out!. Her boss, concerned his employee, walks over to her and asks sympathetically, "What's the matter!?" The blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call that my mother had passed away!."
The boss, feeling very sorry at this point suggests to the young girl, "Why don't you go home for the day!.!.!.we aren't terribly busy!. Just take
the day off and go relax!."
Sally very calmly states, "No I'd be better off here!. I need to keep my mind busy and I have the best chance of doing that here!."
The boss agrees and allows her to work as usual!. "If you need anything just let me know" says the boss!.
A few hours pass and the boss decides to check on Sally!. He looks out his office and sees her crying hysterically!.
He rushes over an asks, "What's the matter now!? Are you going to be ok!?"
Sally breaks down in tears!. "I just received a horrible call from my sister!. She said that her mom died too!!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree!? You wave to her!. !.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.Only funny because it was my one armed daughter that told that to me!
When the blonde learned she was pregnant she ask the Dr!. ' Are you sure it's mine"Www@Enter-QA@Com
When the blonde learned she was pregnant she ask the Dr!. ' Are you sure it's mine"Www@Enter-QA@Com
49 blondes and 1 brunette were hanging on to the bottom of a plane (they were skydiving) the brunette went first all the blondes clappedWww@Enter-QA@Com
Check out this site and you will find TONS of blonde jokes!.
http://www!.dmoz!.org/Recreation/Humor/Jok!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
http://www!.dmoz!.org/Recreation/Humor/Jok!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Go to: maximonline!.com/jokes/archives
They have a TON of blond jokes!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
They have a TON of blond jokes!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
why cant a blonde call 911!?
because theres no 11 on the phone!. xDWww@Enter-QA@Com
because theres no 11 on the phone!. xDWww@Enter-QA@Com