U will only get if your from the uk.?!


Question: The story is allegedly true. The scene is a Glasgow court and a witness (a ned) is being questioned by a rather plummy mouthed Advocate Depute (AD)

AD 'You say you went to your friends house that night. Why did you
go there?'

WITNESS 'Tae get a tap.'

AD 'Is your friend a plumber?'

WITNESS 'Naw.'

AD 'Are you a plumber?'

WITNESS 'Naw.'

The witness is a bit bewildered by this line of questioning and the AD realises it, but notices that the court police officer is rubbing his fingers of one hand together in the universal gesture of money.

Daylight apparently dawns on the AD and he changes his line of questioning accordingly.

AD 'So you went to the house to borrow money?'

WITNESS 'Naw.'

AD 'Ah. You went to the house to lend money?'
WITNESS 'Naw.'


In exasperation the AD says,
'You told the court you went to your
friend's? house for a tap.
What kind of a tap was it?'.












WITNESS .......'A Sellick tap.'


Answers: The story is allegedly true. The scene is a Glasgow court and a witness (a ned) is being questioned by a rather plummy mouthed Advocate Depute (AD)

AD 'You say you went to your friends house that night. Why did you
go there?'

WITNESS 'Tae get a tap.'

AD 'Is your friend a plumber?'

WITNESS 'Naw.'

AD 'Are you a plumber?'

WITNESS 'Naw.'

The witness is a bit bewildered by this line of questioning and the AD realises it, but notices that the court police officer is rubbing his fingers of one hand together in the universal gesture of money.

Daylight apparently dawns on the AD and he changes his line of questioning accordingly.

AD 'So you went to the house to borrow money?'

WITNESS 'Naw.'

AD 'Ah. You went to the house to lend money?'
WITNESS 'Naw.'


In exasperation the AD says,
'You told the court you went to your
friend's? house for a tap.
What kind of a tap was it?'.












WITNESS .......'A Sellick tap.'

I DONT GET IT? and I come from the U.K...
sellick tap?
the only thing i could think he meant was sellotape?
but that wouldn't be funny. Please explain someone!

EDIT - Cheers for the explanation! makes more sense and it IS funny, lol.

Teee heee hee...i miss scotland :(

lol, i like that.

i laughed too much for the day
i will tap my mouth



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