Lifes unanswered questions?!


Question: Can you slam a revolving door?

How young can you be, but still die of old age?

What would happen if you found a four-leaf-clover under a ladder?

Can a cross-eyed teacher control his pupils?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

If winnie the pooh was civilized enough to keep his honey in jars, why did he eat it off his hands? Surely he had spoons?

What happens if you get a paper cut from a Get Well card?

Can you read a picture book?

Why does it say "shake well" on ketchup bottles, but not ketchup packets?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism?

Why does it say do not use before work with heavy machinery on the back of childrens tylenol? I mean..really could we save that many people by getting those darn five year-olds with headcolds off those forklifts!

If mirrors need light to work, what happens if you put night vision goggles on in the dark and look at a mirror?

if you're on an American airline, and you land in Canada and stay on the plane, is the drinking age still 21 or does it change to 19? What happens if every team in the NFL goes 8-8?

What shape is the sky?

If a Jewish person goes to court and is asked to put their right hand on the Bible, do they use a Torah instead?

Why is it written "May contain traces of peanuts or other kind of nuts" on peanut butter jars. Are people stupid enough not to realize it themselves?

If you only have one eye...are you blinking or winking?

If you have a gun and you ask, "can I ask you a question?" and they say "fire away" should you shoot them?

What is a chickpea if it is neither a chick nor a pea?

Why is it called the People's Republic Of China when China's not a republic?

Why are dandelions considered weeds when daisies are considered flowers?

Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?

Whenever an adult is kidnapped why isn't it called adultnapped??

Why do blacklights look purple?

Did Yankee Doodle name the feather, hat, town, or his pony Macaroni?

Why is it that people duck in the rain, do they really think the rain won't hit them?

How come the Bible is the most stolen book, and one of the ten comandments is "thou shall not steal"?

Why isn't the caps lock capitalized?

If there's a hole straight through the earth, from the south pole to the north pole, and you jump through it what would happen? would you keep falling forever, or fall back down when you get to the middle, or is it physically impossible?

If someone with a nostril ring takes it out, then blows their nose, do they have to cover that hole as well as their nostril holes so that snot does'nt blow out everywere?

Isn't it weird that if you rearange the word "teacher" you get "cheater"?

How come whenever you start to sing, you automatically sing in a higher voice than you talk?

How come people say they ate the last piece of gum, when they really just chew it?

If a pope goes to the bathroom, is it considered holy crap? You know the saying "throw ya hands in the air like ya don't care"? why bother doing that if you dont care? Why is there no pine or apple in pineapple? If "Fantasy Island" really granted wishes, why wasn't Tattoo 6'6" ?

Why do water bottles have a "best if used by" date?

If you called the police station to talk to an officer and he was not there, would that be considered a cop out?

Can bald people get a hair line fracture?

Why do they put holes in crackers? How come on TV the bell always rings and then the kids go to class, but in real life you need to be in class before the bell rings?

Why can the saying "it's all downhill from here." mean both that it will be easy and that it is going to get worse?

If all of ACME's products backfire, why does Wile E. Coyote keep buying them?

Why do "cool" and "hot" mean the same thing?

If you sneeze and fart at the same time, does a vacuum form in your stomach?

Why does triangularly cut bread taste better than square bread?

Does a baby feel the umbilical cord being cut off?

Is it legal to name your kid "Anonymous"?

Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

If you have a pet with 2 heads do you have to name both heads?

Why can't liquor freeze?

If you dig a hole in the south pole are you digging up or down?

How come they don't add the time that we are in our mom's to our age?

Why do people squint their eyes when they can't see?

Wouldn't that just make it less space to see out of?

What is a hacky, and why is it in a sack?

Who was in the kitchen with Dina?

Why do we have to pay a toll on "freeways"?

Why do they call them pepperoni if there is no pepper in it?

How old does something have to be to become an antique?

Can a school teacher give a homeless child homework?

Why do they say "an alarm going off," if it is really going on?

Do babies produce more spit than adults?

How come French fries are not considered a vegetable, they are just deep fried potatoes?

Do cows have calf muscles?

Why is shampoo clear but conditioner not?

If conjoined twins participate in sports, do they count as one or two players?

If a singer sings their own song during a karaoke party, is it considered karaoke?

Why do mattresses have designs on them when they're always covered with sheets?

If you died with braces on would they take them off?

If a person suffered from amnesia and then was cured would they remember that they forgot?

Can someone have their head in the clouds and be down-to- earth at the same time? Why is Joey short for Joe, when Joey has more letters?

If you were a pastor, and you were getting married, would you hire a pastor, or would you do the wedding yourself?

Is there a certain temperature at which it stops being qualified as cold? At what temperature does it qualify as hot?

Why is most lunchmeat bigger than the bread?

Why is it that whenever you sing to the radio, your voice is higher? Even when you have a low voice?

How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown?

Have ex-punsters been expunged?

Have ex-mathematicians become dysfunctional?

Have ex-locomotive engineers been derailed?

Have ex-civil lawyers been distorted?

Have ex-bankers become disinterested?

Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

After eating, do amphibians have to wait an hour before getting out of the water?

Can fat people go skinny-dipping?

You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?


Answers: Can you slam a revolving door?

How young can you be, but still die of old age?

What would happen if you found a four-leaf-clover under a ladder?

Can a cross-eyed teacher control his pupils?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

If winnie the pooh was civilized enough to keep his honey in jars, why did he eat it off his hands? Surely he had spoons?

What happens if you get a paper cut from a Get Well card?

Can you read a picture book?

Why does it say "shake well" on ketchup bottles, but not ketchup packets?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism?

Why does it say do not use before work with heavy machinery on the back of childrens tylenol? I mean..really could we save that many people by getting those darn five year-olds with headcolds off those forklifts!

If mirrors need light to work, what happens if you put night vision goggles on in the dark and look at a mirror?

if you're on an American airline, and you land in Canada and stay on the plane, is the drinking age still 21 or does it change to 19? What happens if every team in the NFL goes 8-8?

What shape is the sky?

If a Jewish person goes to court and is asked to put their right hand on the Bible, do they use a Torah instead?

Why is it written "May contain traces of peanuts or other kind of nuts" on peanut butter jars. Are people stupid enough not to realize it themselves?

If you only have one eye...are you blinking or winking?

If you have a gun and you ask, "can I ask you a question?" and they say "fire away" should you shoot them?

What is a chickpea if it is neither a chick nor a pea?

Why is it called the People's Republic Of China when China's not a republic?

Why are dandelions considered weeds when daisies are considered flowers?

Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?

Whenever an adult is kidnapped why isn't it called adultnapped??

Why do blacklights look purple?

Did Yankee Doodle name the feather, hat, town, or his pony Macaroni?

Why is it that people duck in the rain, do they really think the rain won't hit them?

How come the Bible is the most stolen book, and one of the ten comandments is "thou shall not steal"?

Why isn't the caps lock capitalized?

If there's a hole straight through the earth, from the south pole to the north pole, and you jump through it what would happen? would you keep falling forever, or fall back down when you get to the middle, or is it physically impossible?

If someone with a nostril ring takes it out, then blows their nose, do they have to cover that hole as well as their nostril holes so that snot does'nt blow out everywere?

Isn't it weird that if you rearange the word "teacher" you get "cheater"?

How come whenever you start to sing, you automatically sing in a higher voice than you talk?

How come people say they ate the last piece of gum, when they really just chew it?

If a pope goes to the bathroom, is it considered holy crap? You know the saying "throw ya hands in the air like ya don't care"? why bother doing that if you dont care? Why is there no pine or apple in pineapple? If "Fantasy Island" really granted wishes, why wasn't Tattoo 6'6" ?

Why do water bottles have a "best if used by" date?

If you called the police station to talk to an officer and he was not there, would that be considered a cop out?

Can bald people get a hair line fracture?

Why do they put holes in crackers? How come on TV the bell always rings and then the kids go to class, but in real life you need to be in class before the bell rings?

Why can the saying "it's all downhill from here." mean both that it will be easy and that it is going to get worse?

If all of ACME's products backfire, why does Wile E. Coyote keep buying them?

Why do "cool" and "hot" mean the same thing?

If you sneeze and fart at the same time, does a vacuum form in your stomach?

Why does triangularly cut bread taste better than square bread?

Does a baby feel the umbilical cord being cut off?

Is it legal to name your kid "Anonymous"?

Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

If you have a pet with 2 heads do you have to name both heads?

Why can't liquor freeze?

If you dig a hole in the south pole are you digging up or down?

How come they don't add the time that we are in our mom's to our age?

Why do people squint their eyes when they can't see?

Wouldn't that just make it less space to see out of?

What is a hacky, and why is it in a sack?

Who was in the kitchen with Dina?

Why do we have to pay a toll on "freeways"?

Why do they call them pepperoni if there is no pepper in it?

How old does something have to be to become an antique?

Can a school teacher give a homeless child homework?

Why do they say "an alarm going off," if it is really going on?

Do babies produce more spit than adults?

How come French fries are not considered a vegetable, they are just deep fried potatoes?

Do cows have calf muscles?

Why is shampoo clear but conditioner not?

If conjoined twins participate in sports, do they count as one or two players?

If a singer sings their own song during a karaoke party, is it considered karaoke?

Why do mattresses have designs on them when they're always covered with sheets?

If you died with braces on would they take them off?

If a person suffered from amnesia and then was cured would they remember that they forgot?

Can someone have their head in the clouds and be down-to- earth at the same time? Why is Joey short for Joe, when Joey has more letters?

If you were a pastor, and you were getting married, would you hire a pastor, or would you do the wedding yourself?

Is there a certain temperature at which it stops being qualified as cold? At what temperature does it qualify as hot?

Why is most lunchmeat bigger than the bread?

Why is it that whenever you sing to the radio, your voice is higher? Even when you have a low voice?

How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown?

Have ex-punsters been expunged?

Have ex-mathematicians become dysfunctional?

Have ex-locomotive engineers been derailed?

Have ex-civil lawyers been distorted?

Have ex-bankers become disinterested?

Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

After eating, do amphibians have to wait an hour before getting out of the water?

Can fat people go skinny-dipping?

You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?

Those are Great!!! I assume your question is that you're asking for some more, so here are some more:

1. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
4. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
6. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she
told me, it would defeat the purpose.
7. Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't going as ghosts but as
mattresses?
8. If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him
... is he still wrong?
9. If someone with split personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
10. Is there another word for synonym?
11. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do practice?
12. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"
13. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
14. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
15. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
16. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
17. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
18. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
19. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
20. Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?
21. How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
22. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
23. What was the best thing before sliced bread?
24. One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.
25. To be intoxicated is to feel sophisticated, but not be able to say it.
26. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
27. The older you get, the better you realize you were.
28. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
29. Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.
30. Women like silent men; they think they're listening.
31. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
32. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and
drink beer all day.
33. Do pediatricians play miniature golf on Wednesdays?
34. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
35. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
36. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
37. If God dropped acid, would he see people?
38. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
39. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
40. If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
41. If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?
42. If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?

Is Atheism a non-prophet organization?

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him ... is he still wrong?

Is there another word for synonym?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" what should you answer?

If you were twice as smart, you’d still be stupid.

Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to like you?

well...i have a question...WHY DO U HAVE SO MUCH TIME???

Fat people don't skinny dip; they Chunky Dunk

hahaha. funny.

... NOT

what a stupid way to spend your time. these aren't even funny. just... stupid

HAHA!!! Those are SO Hilarious. THANKS!!!

couple things
If a Jewish person goes to court and is asked to put their right hand on the Bible, do they use a Torah instead?
yes
Can someone have their head in the clouds and be down-to- earth at the same time? Why is Joey short for Joe, when Joey has more letters?
they're both short for Joseph
If you were a pastor, and you were getting married, would you hire a pastor, or would you do the wedding yourself?
Hire a pastor
If you dig a hole in the south pole are you digging up or down?
Down because its relative
Why do people squint their eyes when they can't see?
Wouldn't that just make it less space to see out of?
It focuses your sight by limiting it.
How come the Bible is the most stolen book, and one of the ten comandments is "thou shall not steal"?
my favorite :P
Star! :)

lmao this is funny

Very interesting. Star for you. Thanks

A cat always lands on its paws, but what if you spread butter on its back?

The person that found out you could get milk from a cow....What were they doing?

Why aren't more things made from human hair, look how quickly it blunts a razor, gotta be strong!

What is normal? And who decided, I wasn't consulted?

Why doesn't a computer keyboard have an 'Any Key'?

What's the difference between light and hard? Well I personally can sleep with a light on.

If you tried to print Murphy's Law, would the printer jam?

(More to come as I think of them)

very funny thanks

42



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