10 Points!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?!
Question: The person that tells me the best joke wins!!!
dirty jokes are fine
Answers: The person that tells me the best joke wins!!!
dirty jokes are fine
Q. What do a Rubix cube and a penis have in common?
A. The longer you play with them, the harder they get.
and.......(may fav lol)
Reasons to go to work naked
1. Your boss is always yelling, "I wanna see your *** in here by 8:00!"
2. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan.
3. "I'd love to chip in, but I left my wallet in my pants."
4. To stop those creepy guys in Marketing from looking down your blouse.
5. You want to see if it's like the dream.
6. So that with a little help from Muzak you can add "Exotic Dancer" to your exaggerated resume.
7. People stop stealing your pens after they've seen where you keep them.
8. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk.
9. Gives "bad hair day" a whole new meaning.
10. No one steals your chair
(more)
a little boy's mom made him go out to the store and told him not to go in the streets [the bad way].. he went the bad way and heard the word "*****" and asked his mom what it meant and she told him it meant priest. next day he heard the word "sh!t" and asked his mom again what it meant. she told him it means food. same thing happened and he heard "f u c k".. asked his mom and she it means folding the clothes. so the next day the doorbell rang and the little boy answered.. it was the priest coming over for diner. the little boy said "hey *********! s h i t's on the table and mom and dad are f u c k i n g upstairs."
you have a sick mind
a horse walks into a bar and asks for a beer and the bar tender says "why the long face"
If you had a ten inch penis sticking straight out of your forehead, how much of it could you see?
None of it, because your balls would be in your eyes!!!
A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face?
No points for me!!! or luketown, man i type slow! and this joke stinks.
hehe i like this one :-P
think of the person you hate the most nd put his/her name on the blank:
Meet _________ ,the garbage man,
He / She lives in a garbage can,
He / She went to her auntie,
and ripped her panty,
He's / She's ________ ,the garbage man!
(Sing it to the tune of Popeye the sailor man!)
Kris walks into the bedroom with a sheep under his arm, and says "Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache"
His girlfriend is lying in bed and says "I think you'll find that's a sheep you idiot."
The man says, "I think you'll find I wasnt talking to you!"
Q:what room cannot be entered?
a:a mushroom.lol...
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!” The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”
D nice had a funny one
Man comes to his rabbi and says " I have a problem. See, I and my wife have raised our son according to traditions, sent him to best yeshivas and universities, and now that he's older, he wants to be a christian! Rabbi, what should I do?" Rabbi answers "Funny you ask Me this, for I too have a son and I raised him as a good Jewish boy as well, but when he grew up he also wanted to become a christian."
Man: "Well, what did you do?"
Rabbi: "As any good Rabbi I turned to God for answers."
Man: "And what did He tell you?"
Rabbi: "He said -"Funny you should ask Me this,..."
Fresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.
Instead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."
Willing to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.
"How long will this take?" she asks.
"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.
The wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"
"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"
He lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..
one day a dad is sitting on the sofa readin his newspaper when his 5 year old daughter comes downstairs and asks
"were does poo comes from"?
well the dad is thinking thats an odd question for a 5 year old so he answers it the best way he can and says
" well you know you had your breakfast, well it goes all he way to your tummy and the tummy takes all the good bits out and the bad bits come out of you bum"
5 mins later she asks ... and tiger ?
What do you call a woman who has everything? You don't because you don't want to catch any of it.