Fatal things to say if your wife is pregnant?!
Question: I finished the Oreo`s.
Not to imply anything, but I don`t think the kid weighs 40
pounds.
Y`know, looking at her, you`d never guess that Pamela Lee
had a baby!
I sure hope your thighs aren`t gonna stay that flabby
forever!
Well, couldn`t they induce labor? The 25th is the Super
Bowl.
Darned if you ain`t about five pounds away from a surprise
visit from that Richard Simmons fella.
Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Boy,
that`s gotta hurt.
Whoa! For a minute there, I thought I woke up next to
Willard Scott!
I`m jealous! Why can`t men experience the joy of
childbirth?
Are your ankles supposed to look like that?
Get your *own* ice cream.
Geez, you`re awfully puffy looking today.
Got milk?
Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney?
Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of
Madagascar!
Retaining water? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water...
Your stomach sticks out almost as
Answers: I finished the Oreo`s.
Not to imply anything, but I don`t think the kid weighs 40
pounds.
Y`know, looking at her, you`d never guess that Pamela Lee
had a baby!
I sure hope your thighs aren`t gonna stay that flabby
forever!
Well, couldn`t they induce labor? The 25th is the Super
Bowl.
Darned if you ain`t about five pounds away from a surprise
visit from that Richard Simmons fella.
Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Boy,
that`s gotta hurt.
Whoa! For a minute there, I thought I woke up next to
Willard Scott!
I`m jealous! Why can`t men experience the joy of
childbirth?
Are your ankles supposed to look like that?
Get your *own* ice cream.
Geez, you`re awfully puffy looking today.
Got milk?
Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney?
Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of
Madagascar!
Retaining water? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water...
Your stomach sticks out almost as
You're going straight to hell for those ones if she catches you!
Very close to the end of my first pregnancy my sister drove me to a hospital appointment - her husband told her to put a bin liner on the seat to protect the upholstery in case i went into labour in the car - still not sure if that was a dig at me or her driving!
you are gonna lose that weight after "it" is born right? that will get you 2 years on the couch make sure you refer to the baby as it!
I saw a movie about child birth,and It looks like when you first see the head comming out of you --I screamed!!!! He's already breaking my stuff !!!!!!!!!!
"I finished the Oreo's" LOL