I need the funniest joke ever...10 points!?!


Question: Best joke you've ever heard.

I have a friend that needs cheering up. Nothing corny..be witty people! I'm counting on you!


Answers: Best joke you've ever heard.

I have a friend that needs cheering up. Nothing corny..be witty people! I'm counting on you!

Corny is what I am best at, but there is this one:
I was reading the other day that, apparently, 1 in 5 people are Chinese...and there are 5 people in my family, so, which one is it?

Well, it's not me...so, it’s either my mum...

...or my dad...

...or my older brother Colin...

...or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu.


Hmm...it's probably Colin.

Q: What do you call a black pilot?





A: A PILOT, YOU RACIST!

A baby seal walked into a club.

Chuck Norris CAN belive its not butter....

ill try my bets but this is all i got



here goess


"theres was thins one time a japanesse gilr having sex and she acidentaly farted....and she said"me no fart its just front hole so happy make back hole laugh"

lmao its dumb but makesu laugh if caughtofguard

You and your brother are simese twins.
You are connected at the hip.
He is gay your not.
He's invited his boyfriend over tonight.
You only have one ***.

1)whats red and looks like a bucket?
a red bucket

2)what starts with e and ends in e and has one letter?
a envelope

a guy and a lady are driving through louisiana. all of a sudden, they get pulled over by a state trooper. the trooper walks over to the window and asks the man for his license and registration. man's wife yells, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" man leans over and yells, "HE ASKED FOR MY LICENSE AND REGISTRATION." "OKAY," she replies. the trooper asks, "you know why i pulled you over, sir?" the wife leans over and yells, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" the man yells back, "HE ASKED IF I KNEW WHY HE PULLED ME OVER." "OKAY," she replies. so the trooper looks at the license and says, "you're from mississippi, huh? the worst piece of *** i ever had was from there." the wife leans over and yells, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" the man leans over and replies, "HE SAID HE THINKS HE KNOWS YOU!"

So a guy walks into a bar....OUCH!

A boy came home from school and met his dad,"Dad, today I had sex with the teacher!"
Dad,"WoW!! That's great.Just Great.You are following my footsteps.I'm glad you did it!Come boy I'll give you a treat!Let's go the Cafe now.You can eat as much ice cream as you like.You need to be perked up"
Boy," Dad cannot we wait for the next day.'cauz , you see the *** is still paining."

man walks into psychiatrist's office completely naked but wrapped in Saran wrap.


first thing the psychiatrist says is "I can clearly see your nuts."

Viagra

The old man in his mid-eighties struggles to get up from the couch then starts putting on his coat. His wife, seeing the unexpected behavior, asks, "Where are you going?"
He replies, "I'm going to the doctor."
She says, "Why, are you sick?"
He says, "Nope, I'm going to get me some of that Viagra stuff."
Immediately the wife starts working and positioning herself to get out of her rocker and begins to put on her coat.
He says, "Where the hell are you going"?
She answers, "I'm going to the doctor, too."
He says, "Why, what do you need?"
She says, "If you're going to start using that rusty old thing, I'm getting a tetanus shot."



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