Give me some jokes please?!
Question: i havn't heard any funny jokes for the past few days.. Will someone please write me some? please and thanks
Answers: i havn't heard any funny jokes for the past few days.. Will someone please write me some? please and thanks
http://www.jokes2go.com/
has some jokes and sometimes even a funny picture
How do you confuse a blonde?
Put her in a circle room and tell her to sit in the corner.
You're so ugly, your mom had to feed you with a slingshot.
Why did god create Adam before he created Eve?
Because he didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam.
heres a one of my favorites...
Little April was not the best student in Sunday school.
Usually she slept through the class.
One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"
When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.
A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. 'JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep.
Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ****!"
The Teacher fainted.
heres another one of my favorites...
Little Johnny comes home from school one day and asks his mother what "S**T" meant.
Thinking fast she replied "food on the table".
Next day he comes home and asks his mother what does "son of a B***H" mean.
Again, thinking fast again she says "It's a priest".
Next day he comes home a asks what does "F*****G'" mean. She says it means "getting dressed".
That same night a priest was coming over for dinner. Johnny is just finished setting the table when he hears the doorbell ring.
He yells "got it". He opens the door and says "Hey son of a B***H, S*** is on the table and mom and dad are upstairs F*****G.
Once there was a lady with a mansion. She did't know what to name her mansion, so she watched some tv. There was a news broadcaster named "Hary Butt". The lady said, "Oh! I'll call my mansion hairy butt!
One day, she ended up having a baby. (Yeah, I don't know how) She didn't know what to name her baby so she looked at the wall and saw a crack. She said, "I'll name my baby Crack!!"
When crack turned 5, he walked around the mansion and got lost forever. The lady went outside and sat on the stairsteps. She started to cry. Then a man jogging by said, "Hey lady, why are you crying?" She said, "I looked all over my 'hairy butt' *sob* and can't find my 'Crack!' *sob sob*
what do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
pull the pin and throw it back lol
Whats red and white and sits in front of the mirror?
A baby combing his head with a potato peeler.