Do you like this letter from an Irish mother?!


Question: Dear Son,
Just a few lines to let you know I'm still alive. I'm writing this slowly because I know you can't read fast. You wont know the house when you get home, 'cos we've moved.
Your Father has a lovely new job with 700 men under him - he cuts grass at the cemetery. There was a washing machine at the new house, but it's not working too good. Last week I put in 12 shirts, pulled the chain and I haven't seen them since.
Your sister, Colleen had a baby this morning, but I haven't found out if it's a boy or girl, so I don't know if you're an uncle or aunt.
Your Uncle Mick drowned last week in a vat of Whisky at the Dublin Distillery. His mates tried to save him, but he fought them off bravely. He was cremated and it took four days to put the fire out.
I saw the doctor last week and your Father went with me. Doc put a glass tube in my mouth and told me not to talk for five minutes. Your Father wanted to buy it from him. It only rained twice this week, first for four days the second for three days.
We had a letter from the undertaker. He said if the final payment on your Grandmother's grave wasn't paid in seven days - up she comes.
Your loving Mother XXXX
P.S. I was going to send you 10 Punt, but I'd already sealed the envelope.


Answers: Dear Son,
Just a few lines to let you know I'm still alive. I'm writing this slowly because I know you can't read fast. You wont know the house when you get home, 'cos we've moved.
Your Father has a lovely new job with 700 men under him - he cuts grass at the cemetery. There was a washing machine at the new house, but it's not working too good. Last week I put in 12 shirts, pulled the chain and I haven't seen them since.
Your sister, Colleen had a baby this morning, but I haven't found out if it's a boy or girl, so I don't know if you're an uncle or aunt.
Your Uncle Mick drowned last week in a vat of Whisky at the Dublin Distillery. His mates tried to save him, but he fought them off bravely. He was cremated and it took four days to put the fire out.
I saw the doctor last week and your Father went with me. Doc put a glass tube in my mouth and told me not to talk for five minutes. Your Father wanted to buy it from him. It only rained twice this week, first for four days the second for three days.
We had a letter from the undertaker. He said if the final payment on your Grandmother's grave wasn't paid in seven days - up she comes.
Your loving Mother XXXX
P.S. I was going to send you 10 Punt, but I'd already sealed the envelope.

Hey I'm Irish, but I got to admit that was pretty hilarious. I give you a star.

That's hilarious!

personally i think that it is kinda stupid.

Well it made us all giggle here in Ireland!

You might want to amend it to Euro though as we have not had the punt for a few years!

The wording of the letter is funny. We are using €uros now.

I love ya jokes, but you are not getting a star because I heard that you like to cheat and use a different account to give yourself a star and best answer. To me that makes no sense...

LOL

pmsl....very funny.*

LOL

;-)

Brilliant

lol

thats fricken hilarious
im actually laughing so much.
good one
im gunna tell my mum that shes irish lol

lmao!

That's Brillant!

a man leaves home to get work in another country and soon ends up drinking all his money. he sends a letter home to his mother whom he left doing all the hard work on the farm. his mother gets the letter which says ''sell pig send fare''!. mother is so glad to get rid of her drunken son , she sends a letter back saying ''pig dead stop there''.!

thats been around a long long time!!! so old!!



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