Great joke please star if you get a giggle folks. (Bit long, but funny)?!
Question: A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little
> >perch.
> >It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Jeesh,
> >
> >I wonder what happened to this parrot?"
> >
> >The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."
> >
> >"Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered me!"
> >
> >"I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly
> >intelligent thoroughly educated bird."
> >
> >"Oh yeah?" the guy asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto
> >your perch without any feet?"
> >
> >"Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you
> >asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You
> >can't
> >see it because of my feathers."
> >
> >"Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English
> >can't you?"
> >
> >"Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with
> >reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion,
> >sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You
> >really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion."
> >
> >The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't
> >afford that."
> >
> >"Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody
> >wants
> >me cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20; just
> >make
> >the guy an offer!"
> >
> >The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.
> >
> >Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor,
> >he's
> >interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he
> >sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.
> >
> >One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes,
> >"Psssssssssssst,"
> >and motions him over with one wing. "I don't know if I should tell
> >you this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman."
> >
> >"What are you talking about?" asks the guy.
> >
> >"When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at
> >the door in a sheer black nightie."
> >
> >"WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. "THEN what happened?"
> >
> >"Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie
> >and began petting her all over," reported the parrot.
> >
> >"NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"
> >
> >"Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees
> >and began to kiss her all over...."
> >
> >Then the frantic guy demands, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"
> >
> >"Damned if I know. I got a hard-on and fell off my perch!"
Answers: A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little
> >perch.
> >It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Jeesh,
> >
> >I wonder what happened to this parrot?"
> >
> >The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."
> >
> >"Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered me!"
> >
> >"I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly
> >intelligent thoroughly educated bird."
> >
> >"Oh yeah?" the guy asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto
> >your perch without any feet?"
> >
> >"Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you
> >asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You
> >can't
> >see it because of my feathers."
> >
> >"Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English
> >can't you?"
> >
> >"Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with
> >reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion,
> >sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You
> >really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion."
> >
> >The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't
> >afford that."
> >
> >"Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody
> >wants
> >me cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20; just
> >make
> >the guy an offer!"
> >
> >The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.
> >
> >Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor,
> >he's
> >interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he
> >sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.
> >
> >One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes,
> >"Psssssssssssst,"
> >and motions him over with one wing. "I don't know if I should tell
> >you this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman."
> >
> >"What are you talking about?" asks the guy.
> >
> >"When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at
> >the door in a sheer black nightie."
> >
> >"WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. "THEN what happened?"
> >
> >"Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie
> >and began petting her all over," reported the parrot.
> >
> >"NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"
> >
> >"Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees
> >and began to kiss her all over...."
> >
> >Then the frantic guy demands, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"
> >
> >"Damned if I know. I got a hard-on and fell off my perch!"
hahaha brilliant!
haa haa
Brilliant, have a star
Funny
chortle chortle, made me laugh
Good one, made me laugh
Funny.
Have a star
I laughed
thx 4 the laugh
Ha ha ha , I'm still laughing, great punchline !
haha awsome :) starred!
Hahahahaha
hahahaha!! excellent joke lmao.
lmfao!
Good work, and thanks for the laugh.
You deserve a star you lil basterd.
Just kidding!! (:
Good, but old. Here's one!
A blonde, brunette and red head are in a breaststroke race.
They dive in. One minute later, the brunette finishes. Two minutes later, the red head finishes. Twenty minutes later, the blonde finishes.
"Gold for the brunette, silver for the red head, bronze for the blonde." calls out the judge.
The blonde says, "I don't want to be a saw loser, but I think the others were using their arms!"
Star from me too, actualluy laughed out loud not like to usual rubbish.
I nearly fell of my perch laughing.
LOL,LOL,LOL, hilarious, star.
Never expected that ending.....ha ha.
ha ha ha funny
thanks for a laugh
ohmigosh, lol!!! * 4 u!!!
Enjoyed a good laugh out loud joke !
Star for you!
very funny..it gave me a real laugh...good joke