Can anyone come up with an original joke?!


Question: all the jokes on this site seem to have been regurgiated over the years on various websites, can here anyone produce an on the spot, funny joke?


Answers: all the jokes on this site seem to have been regurgiated over the years on various websites, can here anyone produce an on the spot, funny joke?

paddy and mick up in a helicopter, paddy says to mick , see that forrest. mick says no i cant see f*ck all for trees.

No. The only thing I can do is describe events that were funny, but usually it's a case of you had to be there to find it funny.

how many people does it take to change a light bulb?i dont now!
Either do i,ive been sitting in the dark for two fuckin weeks now

me and my bro are havin pancakes, and we r arguin bout who want the first 1.. then my mum says if jesus were here he would say brother you have the first 1, so we thinkl about this then finally i says "jordan why dont you be jesus"

lol

Q. What's the downside of a 3-some?
A. He disappoints 2 women instead of 1.

Here is this guy who really takes care of his body; he lifts weights and jogs five miles every day.

One morning, he looks into the mirror and admires his body. He notices that he is really sun tanned all over except one part and he decides to do something about it.

He goes to the beach, completely undresses and buries himself in the dand except for the one part sticking out.

Two little old ladies are strolling along the beach and one looks down and says, "There really is no justice in this world."

The other little old lady says, "What do you mean?"

The first little old lady says, "Look at that."

"When I was 10 years old, I was afraid of it."

"When I was 20 years old, I was curious about it."

"When I was 30 years old, I enjoyed it."

"When I was 40 years old, I asked for it."

"When I was 50 years old, I paid for it."

"When I was 60 years old, I prayed for it."

"When I was 70 years old, I forgot about it."

"And now that I'm 80, the damned things are growing wild!!"

An old man is sitting on a park bench when a young lad sits down next to Him, pulls out a chocolate bar and eats it in about 5 seconds. The old man looks at Him and then looks away again. The young lad then continues to eat chocolate bars like it's going out of fashion. The old man turned to the lad and said "That much chocolate is bad for You, it give You high cholesterol, blood disorders, acne, and make You tubby." "That's b*llocks" said the lad, "My grandad lived til He was 112." The old man said "From eating chocolate?" "No" said the lad, "From minding His own f*ckin' business."

A dustman knocks on a japanse man`s door.
the jap says "Harro,wot u want?"
Dustman asks "where`s ur bin?"
"i bin on loo" says jap.
"No mate,where`s ya dustbin?"
"i dust bin on loo!" says jap.
"No,no mate, where`s ur wheelie bin?"
"Hokay,i wheelie bin havin a Tommy Tank!"


Chinese man rings his boss "Me no work i sick"
Boss says " when i`m sick i make love 2 my wife,try that?"
2hrs later chinese man rings back,
"Me better now, you got nice house!"

Two Taliban activists are walking through the town.One says to the other"Nice waistcoat".His mate replies"Yeah,cost a bomb".

Original Jokes

There where two men standing on top of an abandoned building when the caretaker came up the stairs and asked , '"what are you to doing?' " The first man said ,"We are flying'". The second man said, "No, don't listen to him just go back down."' The first men said," I'll show you'". So he steps off the building, floats around it and steps back on. The caretaker was amazed and asked, "How did you do that?" The first man said, " It's easy, all you have to do is think you are flying', so the care taker stepped off and hit the floor . It instantly killed him. The second man said to the first man ,"Gabriel ,sometimes for an angel you can be a real bastard!."



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