Whats the funniest joke you've heard?!
Question: What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?
Neil Armstrong was the first man on the moon, Michael Jackson f***s small children
Answers: What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?
Neil Armstrong was the first man on the moon, Michael Jackson f***s small children
person 1: knock knock
person 2: who's there?
person1 : wasnt that a funny joke?
One about some lady falling asleep in church and her husband pricks her leg with a pin.
She exclaims Jesus! when the pastor asks who died for our sins.
Then when the preacher asked What did Eve say to Adam after the birth of their 99th child?
She said "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I'll break it off & shove it up your butt!"
A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette.
When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought,
"Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!"
She got out and walked over to the farmer and said,
"If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?"
The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try.
The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157."
The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car.
Before she left, farmer walked up to her and said.
"If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"
the ones bonkeydollocks tells on here
the one with the punchline..."that's nothing, last week there was a bloke down there shagging a chicken!"
the one with the punchline ' He's only ever done it twice, the first time he was sick and the second time his hat blew off!'
A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face?
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 8(ate) 9! lol!
Gordon Brown...
one day the group of animals had a meeting...
they then decide to tell jokes to each other...
when an animal tells a joke but at least one of it did not laugh they will have to throw that animal that made joke into the sea...
so this story starts...
firstly the cow make a joke...
every animal laugh except the lizard...
so they have nothing to say but throw the cow into the sea...
then the goat make a joke...
none of the animals laugh except the lizard...
after they throw the goat into the sea...
they asked the lizard...what is so funny about the joke that lizard made?...
then he answered, "i now only know that joke that cow make is very funny"...
Two priests and a rabbi were discussing what portion of the weekly collection they kept for themselves. The first priest explained that he drew a circle on the ground, stepped a few paces back and pitched the money towards the circle. What landed in the circle he kept and what landed outside the circle god kept.
The second priest claimed that his method was almost the same, except that what landed outside the circle went to the priest and the money that landed inside the circle god kept.
The rabbi said, "I've got you both beat. I throw the money into the air and what god wants, god takes."