Another great dirty joke?!


Question: Married couple peter and sue, have just had a huge fight, out of the house sue yells, i will he replys, he storms off and books himself into a hotel, later that night peter begins to visualize all the happy times , and decides to drive home to make amends. On the way he stops off at a garage for some flowers and chocolates.
by the time he gets home all the lights are off in the house, he creeps upstairs, and into the bedroom, oh shes asleep i'll wake her up gently with a massage--in the pitch dark room, he begins to smooth his hands over her body, thankfully for him she responds, kissing her lushious lips licking her all over her body, penatrating her with deep force, she responds like a mad women panting like shes never done before, after he gets out of bed and thinks that is the wildest its ever been, he goes downstairs switches on the kitchen light, and his wife is in there, how did you get down here so fast, SHHH she says my mothers asleep upstairs, try not to wake her,


Answers: Married couple peter and sue, have just had a huge fight, out of the house sue yells, i will he replys, he storms off and books himself into a hotel, later that night peter begins to visualize all the happy times , and decides to drive home to make amends. On the way he stops off at a garage for some flowers and chocolates.
by the time he gets home all the lights are off in the house, he creeps upstairs, and into the bedroom, oh shes asleep i'll wake her up gently with a massage--in the pitch dark room, he begins to smooth his hands over her body, thankfully for him she responds, kissing her lushious lips licking her all over her body, penatrating her with deep force, she responds like a mad women panting like shes never done before, after he gets out of bed and thinks that is the wildest its ever been, he goes downstairs switches on the kitchen light, and his wife is in there, how did you get down here so fast, SHHH she says my mothers asleep upstairs, try not to wake her,

...whatever.........old joke.......

lmao.

oh, that's scary - - Poor Peter!

:o)

Woah, poor Peter

LOL, Time for a divorce

I LOVE your joke--very funny. Here's another for you....

A woman was having a daytime affair while her husband was at work. One wet and lusty day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband's car pull into the driveway. "Oh my God - Hurry!Grab your clothes and jump out the window. My husband's home early!"

"I can't jump out the window ~ It's raining out there!" "If my husband catches us in here, he'll kill us both! "she replied. He's got a hot temper and a gun, so the rain is the least of your problems!"

So the boyfriend scoots out of bed, grabs his clothes and jumps out of the window! As he ran down the street in the pouring rain, he quickly discovered he had run right into the middle of the town's annual marathon, so he started running along beside the others, about 300 of them. Being naked, with his clothes tucked under his arm, he tried to blend in as best he could. After a little while a small group of runners who had been watching him with some curiosity, jogged closer.

"Do you always run in the nude?" one asked. "Oh yes!" he replied, gasping in air. "It feels so wonderfully free!" Another runner moved a long side. "Do you always run carrying your clothes with you?""Oh, yes" our friend answered breathlessly. "That way I can get dressed right at the end of the run and get in my car to go home! A third runner looked down and asked "Do you always wear a condom when you run?" "Only when it rains." he replied

haha...eeew.

keep it in the family .lol

PETER NOOOOOO... lmao

Ewww!

lol. that's on the top 5 most horrible things that could happen to you.

OMG i LOVE all yuor jokes! HILARIOUS!

lol
lmao
can u plz giv me best answer? plzzzzzzzz
i need the points
thanks

lol, that was a funny one, star for peter:)

LMSUIAO This was GOOD and it also explains the old adage of "You don't look at the Mantlepiece when you're Poking the Fire"

pmsflol....excellent joke lmao.

lmao, sitting in work here and just let out a big laugh, im getting funny looks from every1 now. that was good

hahahahaha

that is silly.

haha nice...

lol! 10/10

superb. a star for u

just teaches you 2 make sure whos in ya bed huh XD
xxxx



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