Try to tell me this isn't funny! Can you come up with one too?!


Question: Here is the Washington Post's Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers
to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or
changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

The winners are:

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize
it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas
from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of break ing
down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of ge tting
laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray- painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who
doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

12. Karmageddon: It's when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes,
and then the Earth explodes, and it's a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only
things that are good for you

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come
at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after y ou've
accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom
at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit
you're eating.
The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly
contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common
words.

And the winners are:

1. coffee, n. the person upon whom one coughs.

2. flabbergasted, adj. appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.

3. abdicate, v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. esplanade, v. to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. willy-nilly, adj. impotent.

6. negligent, adj. a bsentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a
nightgown.

7. lymph, v. to walk with a lisp.

8. gargoyle, n. olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. flatulence, n. emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over
by a ste amroller.

10. balderdash, n. a rapidly receding hairline.

11. testicle, n. a humorous question on an exam.

12. rectitude, n. the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. pokemon, n. a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. oyster, n. a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism, n. the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto
the roof and gets stuck there.

16. circumvent, n. an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.


Answers: Here is the Washington Post's Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers
to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or
changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

The winners are:

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize
it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas
from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of break ing
down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of ge tting
laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray- painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who
doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

12. Karmageddon: It's when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes,
and then the Earth explodes, and it's a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only
things that are good for you

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come
at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after y ou've
accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom
at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit
you're eating.
The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly
contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common
words.

And the winners are:

1. coffee, n. the person upon whom one coughs.

2. flabbergasted, adj. appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.

3. abdicate, v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. esplanade, v. to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. willy-nilly, adj. impotent.

6. negligent, adj. a bsentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a
nightgown.

7. lymph, v. to walk with a lisp.

8. gargoyle, n. olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. flatulence, n. emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over
by a ste amroller.

10. balderdash, n. a rapidly receding hairline.

11. testicle, n. a humorous question on an exam.

12. rectitude, n. the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. pokemon, n. a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. oyster, n. a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism, n. the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto
the roof and gets stuck there.

16. circumvent, n. an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

yea thats funny...

A blonde, a brunette and a readhead are stuck on an island. For years and years they live there, until one day they find a magic lamp. They rub and rub and sure enough out comes a genie. The genie says "since I can only give out 3 wishes, you may each have one."

The brunette goes first, "I have been stuck here for years, I miss my family and my husband and my life-- I just want to go home" ... POOF she is gone.

The the red head makes her wish "This place sucks, I want to go home too" ... POOF she is gone.

The blonde starts crying uncontrollably. The genie says to her "My dear what is the matter, "I wish my friends were here" ... POOF!!! red head and burnette where returned to the island

Funny! love the first set about just changing one letter. Really good though!

TOOO MUCH TO READ!!!

lol

hey, i got one:

confuze-v-the action of taking fuzz...jk, jk

here's one if u culd combine 2 words though:

blondette-adj-the state of being a mixture of both blonde and brunette

p.s. those r mostly kool!!! i really like giraffiti!!!

~hope i helped

testicle!!!



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