I dunno if this question fits in this category. but...?!
Question: does anyone know where I could find some good websites or does anyone know any good jokes they could tell me? I wanna find out some good jokes to use on a girl that I know xD jus adding fun to the conversations we have.. u know?? plenty of good jokes/help would be very naice =] please if u have any spare as many as u can!! thanks! *no ridiculous jokes, dirty ones etc. jus something to have a good laugh at or one to make ure day lol and one to remember or something like that*
Answers: does anyone know where I could find some good websites or does anyone know any good jokes they could tell me? I wanna find out some good jokes to use on a girl that I know xD jus adding fun to the conversations we have.. u know?? plenty of good jokes/help would be very naice =] please if u have any spare as many as u can!! thanks! *no ridiculous jokes, dirty ones etc. jus something to have a good laugh at or one to make ure day lol and one to remember or something like that*
hm... this is wad i think
i think girls prefer a real life joke or something funny that u have encountered in your actual life. they will find it a whole lot more interesting than telling jokes u find on the internet. so why not try telling something u think is interesting or funny that happened to you?
What smells worse than a shrimp(prawn)?
A shrimps vagina!!! he he.
So 4 guys who had been friends for years go golfing together. They get to the club and one guy realizes that he left his clubs at home for some stupid reason so he tells the others and runs home to get them. While he's gone the other sit down for drinks. One of the men pipes up and starts to tell the others how well his son is doing he says, "Hey guys did I tell you how Edward is doing in realistate? He's doing so well he just gave away a house for free!"
The other's were impressed and another man man decides to talk about his son, "Yes Charles has been doing so well in sell cars he just gave away 2 Rolls Royces away for free!"
Again the other guys were impressed and the 3rd decides he should tell them, "Well Clancy has been doing so well selling private jets he just gave away one for free!"
The others were impressed with this. So the chat it up a bit until the 4th man comes. He finally gets back and they all head out to the course after he's had a drink. On the way there one of the men say, "We were just talking about our boys and how well they've been doing how is Jerry doing?" the man kind of shy's away from the question and says he doesn't want to talk about it. Finally after a bit a prying from his friends he says, "Alright well I'm not too proud to say it but my son is gay. But that's fine I still love him anyway."
The other men just found this hillarious and they just start cracking gay jokes through out the course. Finally the 4th man had enough and he says to them, "Well he must have been doing something right because his last 3 boyfriends gave him 1 house, 2 roll royces and a private jet for free!"
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Yeah I'd agree with the girl at the bottom. Tell her funny stories about yourself I'm sure she'd find that more interesting.... but if you need more jokes try this one.
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So this lady send her husband off to buy her a pack of cigarettes. He goes to the convience store just down the road and they ended up not having the brand his wife wanted. So he decides to check the pub's vending machine. So when he gets to the pub and he goes to the vending machine and as he's feeding it money he looks over at the bar and sees the most gorgeous blond woman he'd ever laid eyes one. So he decides to go talk to her. As they chat it up and after a few drinks they leave together and they go to the womans home. So they start fooling around and as he starts to sober up and realizes what he's doing he stops. He asks the lady for some baby power and she gives it to him. He sprinkles it on his hands and shoves them in his pocket and off to home he goes.
So he gets home and his wife just starts flipping out on him asking him where he's been the man replies, "Sweetheart, I went to the store and they didn't have your brand I went to the pub and I started buying you the cigarettes and I happened to see the most beautiful blond I had ever laid eyes on! I went and talked with her we had a few drinks and we went to her place a started fooling around. I stopped as soon as I realized what I was doing and came home straight to you!"
He's wife looks him up and down and notices he's got his hands in his pockets and says, "Let me see your hands!" he sheepishly takes them out and shows her and she sees the baby powder all over them and she says, "YOU LIAR YOU'VE BEEN PLAYING POOL AT THE PUB AGAIN WITH YOUR FRIENDS!!!"
Just hit Google search with clean jokes and you will be inundated!..:)
An old woman went to the bank to deposit $1 million. Amazed at the amount of money the old woman is depositing, the manager of the bank came out to see the woman himself. Then, he asked the old woman where she got the money from. "Oh, I won them from bets," the old woman replied.
"Orly. You must have won a lot of bets then," the manager asked, still unable to believe the old woman.
"Well okay. You wanna bet $50 that your balls are square?"
The manager smirked to himself and agreed to the bet. They then arranged to meet at the manager's house tomorrow, as the old woman wants to bring her lawyer along to make sure the manager doesn't cheat.
The next day, the old woman went to the manager's house with her lawyer. The manager takes off his pants and let the old woman see his balls, and the old woman asks if she can touch to make sure they are not square. The manager let her touched, as he was sure to win the money. After touching them, she agreed the manager had won and paid him. As the manager was putting on his pants, he saw the old woman's lawyer crying and he asked him why.
Weeping, the lawyer replied, "she bet me $500 she could play with a guy's balls!"
just http://www.riddles.com/ if you like riddles
There are 3 guys driving in a car named Poop Shut-up and Manners. Poop fell out of the car. Shut-up went into police station and the police man said "What is your name?" Shut-up replied "Shut-up." The police man said "Where are your manners?" Shut-up said "outside on the road scrapin' up Poop!"
Yo mama's so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phone book!