Clean, Funny Jokes!?!
Question: A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!" The husband said, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she said. "Just get out."
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One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very Sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So he tied her up and went golfing.
The best one is here:
A wife was making breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he said,
"CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many
at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD!
WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful .
CAREFUL!
Answers: A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!" The husband said, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she said. "Just get out."
**************************************... ****** *****
One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very Sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So he tied her up and went golfing.
The best one is here:
A wife was making breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he said,
"CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many
at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD!
WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful .
CAREFUL!
My back hurts aw!
pull my finger
Awesome
i like the 2nd and 3rd one, but not the first one.
I LOLED on the 3rd one
cute jokes :)
How do you stop a gay baby from crying???
Lol
That was hilarious,a special star from me to you.
Funny stuff!
LMAO! They made my laugh.
the one about the lottery is very funny haha,,,the gulf one was funny too but i would have to say that only a gay man would leave a woman in a nighty tied up just to leave and play gulf lol
hey heres a joke
there was once a mental institution so packed they had to get rid of some of the crazy guys.....so the docs came up with a plan and decided they would let free the least crazy ones..sooo the docs drew a door on the wall and watched who would try to open it.....so along came a bunch of the crazy dudes and tried to open the door.....the docs where dissapointed until they noticed one of the crazy guys sitting alone on the other side of the room laughing his butt off at them...the docs aproached the crazy guy and asked him why he was laughing... and the nut responded,"haha because......those guys are crazy."
and the docs asked why
and he said
"because i have the key to that door"
hahaha..lol
LOL That was funny STAR!!
LOL! Hahaha!!
Nice one!
A star for u!!
lol thanks i have heard that last one many times and its still funny
3rd is best. I dont like first.
nice one...