MEN & MARRIAGE ONE-LINERS part 2 funny or not?!


Question: Women are unpredictable. Before marriage, she expects a man, after marriage she suspects him, and after death she respects him.

How many men does it take to pop popcorn?
Three. One to hold the pan and two others to show off and shake the stove.

In the beginning, God created earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God nor man has rested.

Do you know the punishment for bigamy?
Two Mother-in-laws.

A person receives a telegram informing about his mother-in-law’s death. It also inquires whether she should be buried or burnt. He replies, ‘Don’t take chances. Burn the body and bury the ashes.’

The wife wants to try the missionary position. She’s on top while I’m in Africa.

Never do housework. No man ever made love to a woman because the house was spotless.


Answers: Women are unpredictable. Before marriage, she expects a man, after marriage she suspects him, and after death she respects him.

How many men does it take to pop popcorn?
Three. One to hold the pan and two others to show off and shake the stove.

In the beginning, God created earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God nor man has rested.

Do you know the punishment for bigamy?
Two Mother-in-laws.

A person receives a telegram informing about his mother-in-law’s death. It also inquires whether she should be buried or burnt. He replies, ‘Don’t take chances. Burn the body and bury the ashes.’

The wife wants to try the missionary position. She’s on top while I’m in Africa.

Never do housework. No man ever made love to a woman because the house was spotless.

HA HA HA ...hey u r made of jokes...r nt u.....few i can tell my kids....thanks for a good laugh...non stop.

yes,then?

Funny

laughing soda came out my nose

just as funny as the other part!!

da*n printer!!

it will be fixed 2day!!

two mother in laws... ahahaha!!

i couldn stop laughing
fantastic
keep it up

haha funny

A man walks into the street and manages
to get a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says,
"Perfect timing.
You're just like Frank."

Passenger: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything
right - all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things
happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."

Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete.
He could have
won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the
pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star
and you
should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."

Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."

Cabbie: "There's more.. He had a memory like a computer.
Could remember everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to
order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything.
Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But
Frank Feldman, he could do everything right."

Passenger. "Wow, some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic
and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them.
But Frank, he never made a mistake."

Passenger. "Mmm, there's not many like him around."

Cabbie: "And, he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel
good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the
wrong; and his
clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too - he was
the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever
measure up to Frank Feldman."

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank."

Passenger: "Then how do you know so much about him?"
......................


Cabbie: "I married his ******* widow!

ha ha ha funny
thanks for a laugh
10/10

Ha ha ha.!!!
Another bunch of good jokes Chris.!!!
Got me laughing.!!!
Cheers mate.!!

Excellent



The answer content post by the user, if contains the copyright content please contact us, we will immediately remove it.
Copyright © 2007 enter-qa.com -   Contact us

Entertainment Categories