Anyone got any short jokes to make me laugh?!


Question: I don't like jokes which are too long. 10 points to the best short joke.

Example: I worked for Samaritans and phoned in sick... they talked me out of it!!!!!


Answers: I don't like jokes which are too long. 10 points to the best short joke.

Example: I worked for Samaritans and phoned in sick... they talked me out of it!!!!!

Husband asks , "Do u know the meaning of WIFE??
"Without Information Fighting Everytime"
Wife replies," No, It means ,
"With Idiot For Ever !!!"

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

english, scotish and irish man, there driving throught he desert.

there car breaks down, and so they decide to walk for help.

the english man opens the boot and takes water. 'when we get thirsty we can drink!'

the scotish man grabs food 'when were hungry we can eat'

the irish man rips off the door.

'Paddy, why you taking the door??'

paddy - 'when it gets hot we can open the window!'


-- sorry to the irish people out there. it's only a joke!

why did the cantaloupe jump into the water?
because he wanted to be a watermelon!

hehe
:D

Two very old gents were talking and one said, 'how are you this morning' the other said ' like a new born baby' and 'what do you mean by that' he asked, the other replied,'not hair,no teeth and I've just wet myself'!

did you hear about the transvestite who wanted a night on the town?He wanted to eat,drink and be Mary.

whats black and white and red all over?? a sunburnt penguin... sorry not good at jokes and you did say short.....

. whats the biggest dray back in the jungle an elephants foreskin .

whats brown and sticky.



a stick

Where is an elephants sex organ?
In its foot,if it stamps on you, you are f...ed.

can you keep a secret?

- So can I.

what do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?

nothing you already told her twice



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