The Wife Came Home Early?!
Question: The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman. "You disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me - a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce!" And Paddy (for it was he) replied "Hang on just a minute luv, so at least I can tell you what happened." "Fine, go ahead", she sobbed, " but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"
And Paddy began - "Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments. Since she needed a good clean-up I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't use because I don't have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my
sister gave you for Christmas that you don't use just to annoy her, and
I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and
don't use because someone at work has the same pair."
Here Paddy took a quick breath and continued - "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, "Please ... do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?
Answers: The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman. "You disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me - a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce!" And Paddy (for it was he) replied "Hang on just a minute luv, so at least I can tell you what happened." "Fine, go ahead", she sobbed, " but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"
And Paddy began - "Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments. Since she needed a good clean-up I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't use because I don't have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my
sister gave you for Christmas that you don't use just to annoy her, and
I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and
don't use because someone at work has the same pair."
Here Paddy took a quick breath and continued - "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, "Please ... do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?
hahahaha!!!!!!!! i like Paddy, he's funny...where can i find him?
haha hav a starr
lol
ha ha ha ha ha ha
sounds like he should just keep the new woman
haha! lol!
LOL funny
sounds familiar ----i got into wife swapping -- it was crap ..... they kept bringing her back !!!
oops, guess she asked for that
starred
lol
lol
have a star
heheh! funny! :) lol
thats good
That was funny! Good 1! ^_^
he he gotta tell it to my hubby.
Well written out nice joke .
You get something i don't used--
ha. ha..a<Star>Good Job.
hhahaha thats funny!
lol
LOL.... good wan.... woo~...
Lmao
funny
10/10
Starred
lol so funny
loved it
Good one thanks for sharing. lol hahaha
Good one
I like it. Thank you. lol