Fatal things to say to a pregnant woman!?!


Question: Fatal things to say to your pregnant wife
17. "I finished the Oreo's."
16. "Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid weighs forty pounds."
15. "Y'know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Lee had a baby."
14. "I sure hope your thighs aren't gonna stay that flabby forever."
13. "Well, couldn't they induce labor? The 25th is the SuperBowl."
12. "Darned if you ain't about five pounds away from a surprise visit from that Richard Simmons fella."
11. "Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Boy, that's gotta hurt."
10. "Whoa! For a minute there, I thought I woke up next to Willard Scott!"
9. "I'm jealous. Why can't men experience the joy of childbirth?"
8. "Are your ankles supposed to look like that?"
7. "Get your *own* ice cream."
6. "Geez, you're awfully puffy looking today."
5. "Got milk?"
4. "Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney."
3. "Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of Madagascar!"
2. "Retaining water ? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water."
And the Number 1 Fatal Thing To Say If Your Wife Is Pregnant..
1. "You don't have the guts to pull that trigger."


Answers: Fatal things to say to your pregnant wife
17. "I finished the Oreo's."
16. "Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid weighs forty pounds."
15. "Y'know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Lee had a baby."
14. "I sure hope your thighs aren't gonna stay that flabby forever."
13. "Well, couldn't they induce labor? The 25th is the SuperBowl."
12. "Darned if you ain't about five pounds away from a surprise visit from that Richard Simmons fella."
11. "Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Boy, that's gotta hurt."
10. "Whoa! For a minute there, I thought I woke up next to Willard Scott!"
9. "I'm jealous. Why can't men experience the joy of childbirth?"
8. "Are your ankles supposed to look like that?"
7. "Get your *own* ice cream."
6. "Geez, you're awfully puffy looking today."
5. "Got milk?"
4. "Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney."
3. "Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of Madagascar!"
2. "Retaining water ? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water."
And the Number 1 Fatal Thing To Say If Your Wife Is Pregnant..
1. "You don't have the guts to pull that trigger."
You forgot, "You know its half your fault"

That one doesnt go over very well. Trust me!
LMAO!!!

Those are too funny. Thanx 4 tha laughs!
LOL thanks that is so cute...LOL
haha! i like the last one.
"You're so big for....______ months."
All right all right Don't have a BABY!!!!!
I don't know about **fatal**, but suggesting that you have a video night and watch "Alien" might be dangerous. :-)
Although this is not a question it is funny! lol Thanks for making me smile today.
How about why dont we have sex anymore!
mmkay.
Should there have been a laugh in there somewhere?
Sorry I missed it.
haha! thats great! if i was the wife i would have sat on him and crushed him 2 death by about number 11
LOL that's good and should be required reading for all new fathers, it might save a life!
What about (to any first time mother who's 37 weeks pregnant and can't wait to not be pregnant anymore)

"Well you know first time mums ALWAYS go overdue, so you've got at least another 5 weeks to go!"

I was ready to kill anyone who trotted that one out to me! Lol!! Luckily my son arrived at 38 weeks + 5.
Thank you so much for the insight...it made my afternoon
You look like budah
Hey look, you have another stretch mark

...it's like throwing a hot dog down a hall way
just from a sadist's mouth can these words come from to tell a pregn. woman
must be an american thing.
uh sure those are lovely. But the worst is when someone thinks ur pregnant when u aren't
lol
lol
Too funny!!still rofl...i loved the last one...here's one star from me..
These are absolutely PHENOMENAL!!!!!
Funny, but very odd coming from a female.
cool!star for you!
how about, god, you look fat today or wow your a*s is nearly as big as your belly
o.k whats funny ? It is called being mean !
lmfao
ha ha ha funny
lmap pumped
love last one :P

xxx
Very funny


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