Last few for just now, funny or not.?!
Question:
Last few for just now, funny or not.?
One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in
a verysexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything
you want." So he tied her up and went golfing.
>>> > ******************************...
A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran
into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her
lungs, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!"
The husband said, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or
mountain stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she said. "Just get out."
>>> > ******************************...
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right,
and the other is a husband.
>>> > ******************************...
A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's
license. First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician
showed him a card with the letters: 'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'
"Can you read this?" the optician asked.
"Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."
>>> > ******************************...
>>> > Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them,
"I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in
the convent."
"Thank God," said an elderly nun at the back. "I'm so tired of
chardonnay."
>>> >
>>> > ******************************...
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.
"Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my
GOD! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM
NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE
BUTTER?
They're going to STICK! Careful . CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL!
You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them!
Hurry up!
Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them.
You
know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT!
THE
SALT!"
The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you?
You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it
feels
like when I'm driving."
Answers: All so funny, can't decide which one is best. lol nice one
vengeance is mine says the husband
lmao cheers Ha Ha Ha clever! love the egg/driving joke!! =) They are awesome! gave me and my other half a good laugh!!!! More please!! LOL i like them 10. These are absolutely hilarious - LUV em'!! STAR!!!! I really liked the last one! lol like all of them ha ha ha funny So funny.thanks