An Aussie and a Kiwi....?!

An Aussie and a Kiwi....?

An Aussie and a Kiwi (new zealander) are checking out a piece of acreage to buy as farmland.
Walking around the boundary of the property, the Aussie spots a sheep with it's head stuck in the fence.
Before he can say a word, the Kiwi man, being true to his nature, has dropped his drawers and begun having his way with the helpless livestock.
The Kiwi boy finishes up, pulls up his drawers and saunters his way back over.
"Mate" he says, "tell me you dont want a piece of that".
"Fair dinkum i do" replied the Aussie, and as quick as a flash he drops his daks and jams his head into the fence.

NICE ONE
A cowboy rode into town and pulled his horse up in front of the first saloon that he came to. He dismounted and tied the horse to the hitching rail and saw that he was being watched by a group of old-timers sitting on a bench beside the front door of the saloon. The cowboy went to the rear of the horse, lifted its tail and kissed the horse. He then turned to walk into the saloon. "How come you done that cowboy?" asked one old timer. "I've got chapped lips," replied the cowboy. "Does that make em' heal up faster?" asked the old timer. "Naw," replied the cowboy. "It stops me from lickin' em and maken' em worse."