Any Jokes?!

Any Jokes?

Does anyone know some good, not out of date jokes?

well i have one like the first one

well this man went to america and joined the army. he learned how to say "Sir, yes Sir!"

then while he was walking back home he looked for a job.
first he went into a restraunt. he learned how to say "FORKS AND KNIVES! FORKS AND KNIVES!"
later he got fired from that job.

Next he decided to work in a candy store. there he learned how to say, "goodie, goodie gumdrop" he got fired from that job.

He decided to take dance lessons next. while dancing he heard the song sing "forever, forever, forever and 4 more"
He quit.

So one day he found a man dead on the ground. a police officer came and asked "did u kill this man?"
He replied "Sir, yes Sir"

The officer asked, "Wat did u kill him with?"
The man said, "FORKS AND KNIVES FORKS AND KNIVES"

so the officer cuffed him and said ur going to jail.
so the man said "Goodie goodie gumdrop"

LAter in jail the guard asked him how long he wanted to stay.
He said "Forever forever forever and 4 more"