Londoners limerick?!


Question:

Londoners limerick?

there was a young harlot from Kew

who filled her vagina with glue

she said with a grin,

"if they pay to get in"

"they'll pay to get out of it too!"


Answers:

There was a young fellow from Trinity
Who ruined his sister's virginity.
Buggered his brother,
had twins by his mother
and took a degree in divinity.


There was a young man from Kildare
who was messing with a girl on the stair
the bannister broke, but he doubled his stroke
and finished her off in midair


A maid from Bexhill on Sea,
lay with a plumber upon a setee.
Said the maid 'Stop your plumbing!
There's somebody coming.'
Said the plumber, still plumbing, 'Its me.'


Now the youngest young lady, named Lou,
Said as his Lordship withdrew,
The Vicar is quicker,
Stronger and thicker,
And two inches longer than you!


The girls who frequent picture palaces,
care not for psycho-analysis.
They're rather annoyed
by the great doctor Freud.
And cling to their long-standing phalluses.


Mary had a little pig
She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up,
She shot the little bastard.



Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two hunks of bread.


JACK AND JILL Went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Dozy Jill forgot the pill
And now they have a son.


Mary had a little Lamb,
She tied it to a pylon.
10,000 volts went up it's a-r-s-e,
and turned it's wool to nylon.



Mary had a little pig,
she couldn't stop it grunting.
She took it down the garden path,
and kicked its little head in.


Mary had a little watch,
She swallowed it one day.
She took a dose of Castor oil,
to pass the time away.
The oil, it did not work.
The time it did not pass.
So if you want to know what time it is,
You'll have to look up Mary's a-r-s-e.

Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
To have some hanky panky
Silly Jill
Forgot the pill
And now there's baby Frankie.


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