Why do women lie?!


Question:

Why do women lie?

Why Women Lie






One day, when a seamstress was sewing while
sitting close to a river,
her thimble fell into the river.


When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked,
"My dear child, why are
you crying?"

The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen
into the water and
that she needed it to help her husband in making a
living for their
family.

The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled
up a golden thimble
set with pearls.

"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked The
seamstress replied, "No."

The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out
a silver thimble
ringed with sapphires.

"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

Again, the seamstress replied, "No."

The Lord reached down again and came up with a
leather thimble. "Is this
your thimble?" the Lord asked.

T he seamstress replied, "Yes."

The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and
gave her all three
thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home
happy.

Some years later, the seamstress was walking with
her husb! and alo ng the
riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and
disappeared under the
water.

When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and
asked her, "Why are you
crying?"

"Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!"

The Lord went down into the water and came up with
George Clooney.

"Is this your husband?" the Lord asked.

"Yes," cried the seamstress.

The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an
untruth!"

The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord.
It is a
misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to
George Clooney, you would

have come up with Brad Pitt. Then if I said 'no'
to him, you would have come

up with my husband. Had I then said 'yes,' you
would have given me all three.
Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not
be able to take care
of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes'
to George Clooney.

And so the Lord let her keep him.

The moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies,
it's for a good and
honorable reason, and in the best interests of
others.

That's our story, and we're sticking to it.


Answers:

This one is perfect! HAHAHA here's one for you...

Little Johnny sees his Daddy's car passing the playground and going into the woods. Curious, he follows the car and sees Daddy and Aunt Jane kissing.
Johnny finds this so exciting and can barely contain himself as he runs home and starts to tell his mother excitedly. "MOMMY, MOMMY, I WAS AT THE PLAYGROUND AND DADDY AND..."
Mommy tells him to slow down, but that she wants to hear the story.
So Johnny tells her. "I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went to look and Daddy was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt, then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane laid down on the seat, then Daddy..."
At this point, Mommy cut him off and said, "Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the rest of it for supper time. I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight."
At the dinner table, Mommy asks Johnny to tell his story. He describes the car into the woods, the undressing, laying down on the seat, and, "then Daddy and Aunt Jane did that same thing Mommy and Uncle Jeff used to do when Daddy was in the Army."


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